That White Shirt
by rhapsomylo
Summary: It was months ago, that incident in the shower room. But then why is the guilt still there?  MAJOR Kurtainn, complete! / Written and posted before Theatricality!
1. Part One, Prologue

Admittedly, my first Glee Fanfic. Tell me what you think, really, I want to know how to improve myself. If you see anything that seems contradictory, tell me, cause I do that sometimes. Yes yes, Kurtainn all the way. Of course, every good story needs a good set up though...

(This was written and posted before "Theatricality". So. That's why they're different. xD)

(I own nothing. .3.)

* * *

September, William McKinley, Prologue.

_It. Was cold. Late summer/ Early fall often had these bipolar days, days where the sun could be up and shining, but the wind would be like icicles across the skin, making breathing intense, coating the lungs with a layer of ice. It wasn't yet winter in Lima, not even that fall time where everything had that tinge of orange. It was just cold._

_It was after practice. The Oh-so-called Lima-losers walked, tired and ragged off the field into the shower room. Lockers banged and voices echoed off the chilly walls, and as shower heads were turned to full blast, steam wafted through the stalls. Finn Hudson sighed, twisting the cheap locks to put his stuff in an unmarked locker before making his way over to one of the shower stalls. He'd been on the football team practically since birth. He really didn't care about his body in front of the guys anymore. He knew he wasn't bad looking, and no there was no comment made to him that couldn't be retaliated with a well-aimed Rat tail to the lower spine. Ha._

_Despite the chilling weather, made even more obvious by the jolt of cold he got every time he leaned against a tiled wall, he was filthy with sweat. He was in no hurry to get out of the direct stream of liquid hot, and instead stood, taking his time and quietly, very quietly, singing under his breath. As far as Finn was concerned, all was good for him._

_The same, however, could not be said for the boy-And the word boy was used pointedly, comparative to how he looked lined up against the men- at the far end of the shower stalls. He looked small, weak, vulnerable, and not to mention utterly ridiculous. It was no great secret that Kurt Hummel cared about his image. But as he worked, quick, fleeting, like a scared rabbit, Finn had to roll his eyes at him. Along with him to the shower Kurt had brought a small black bag (Okay, purse. It was a purse.) filled with six –Six!- different bottles, mostly colors bright green, purple, and one that literally had a flower on it. Finn sighed, turning away from Kurt before it became weirder than it already was._

I shouldn't be looking anyway._ He hissed mentally, turning to the perfectly fine soap spigot in the stall. He busied himself with fervently washing his hair, ignoring his overriding annoyance and pity. Somewhere inside him, he could hear his conscience screaming –Do something!- but what he was to do, he couldn't fathom. So he ignored that voice too, and quietly sang Drive by Incubus under his breath._

_What happened next, though, challenged everything he'd thought about himself._

_He should have seen it coming, of course, Kurt had been to two practices before and had only narrowly escaped the brutal torture, so it only stood to reason that the rest of the team would sharpen their own minds. It started out as a definitive slapping of feet across the lukewarm tile floor, light splashes, laughter. Finn had just enough time to rinse the soap from his eyes and see Puck, half dressed in a pair of red shorts and followed by four other hulking gorilla-men, making their way to the end of the stalls. His eyes met Kurt's for a third of a second before Kurt could open his mouth in horror and let out a tiny, weak, pleading 'no.'_

_That did nothing, of course, as Puck reached in and grabbed Kurt's arm. Mixed with the wet floor the boy had no choice, and was dragged out of the water into full view. Admittedly, Finn had not looked away at first, though whether it was out of concern or interest would become a raging mental debate for weeks after. It was obvious that Puck had meant only to humiliate him, and a moment later when Kurt lost his footing, the jock could have almost looked worried. But as the little soprano crashed down a moment later, the sound of his jaw cracking against the floor resonating against the tile walls, a smile split Puck's face and he turned and walked away, meeting Finn's eyes a moment later. Finn tried not to look like he was horrified, and put a halfhearted smile on, if only to avoid the future ridicule. Puck nodded and moved on, his goonies behind him._

_As soon as they were out of sight though, Finn had to turn back. He was a step and a half out the stall before he stopped himself, forcing his legs to go no further. It wasn't that he didn't want to help Kurt, no, there was no excuse for him not to, but he didn't want to help Kurt…naked. It was cripplingly obvious just how much Kurt liked him, and a kind gesture in the shower room undressed would be so, so easily misinterpreted. And what if Puck came back? He'd never live it down. Finn made himself go back, watching in gut wrenching pain as Kurt got up, inching towards the stall and getting to his feet. As he did, he turned and spat. The ground turned red where he did._

_No._

_Finn turned away, knowing he wouldn't be able to bear the sight of Kurt seeing all of his precious hair-care bottles ruined in front of him. He turned the shower off with a jerk and walked out, back to his locker and back to reality. Dressing quickly, he was just walking towards the door when he saw the clothes. He could almost feel what would come of Kurt's emotions. About four different items of clothing were spread about the floor, stepped on, damp, wrinkled. Unable to think, he moved over to them._

"_Yo, dude."_

_Finn jmped, seeing Puck not far off in the doorfame. Unsure if he'd been caught, he blinked. _

"_Wha.."_

"_You coming?"_

_Relief flooded his body. "Y-yeah. One sec."  
_

_Puck shrugged and moved on._

_Finn, growing up with only a mother, and a mother who liked to do things for him, was no master in the art of folding clothes. He did his best, unable to ignore how they were stained and wet. He tried though, placing the wickedly fancy shirts and pants on a bench, then booking it the hell out of there._

_That was that then. He'd done a good thing, a service, he'd helped a person in need. That was good, right?_

_His hand reached into his pocket, only to grab empty space. _

…_no._

_Damn it, how many times had he done that? His iPod, no doubt, would be sitting three lockers away from the place where he'd put his clothes, ready to be stolen away. He did an abrupt heel-toe and marched back into the locker room, thinking only of his iPod, not the emotionally troubled youth that shared the space._

_He stopped dead when he heard the crying._

_It wasn't that manly kind of crying, if that existed, where it was troubled but still kind of masculine like. It wasn't girly crying either, all whiny and soulful. It was just…crying. Sobbing, wailing, a complete world of pain and woe in a few short sobs. Like someone had just smacked a baby for no reason. Finn moved forward, stopped, moved again. What did he do now? _iPod. _He told himself coldly. _iPod.

_He moved, knowing he was going to cross paths, but ignoring it. He assumed he could just ignore him, act like he was deaf and stupid or broken or something. He couldn't, however, ignore Kurt as he ran into his abdomen. His big green eyes raised to meet Finn's own for a moment, and Finn couldn't ignore what he saw. Kurt's eyes were red, puffy, and carried a betrayal beyond belief. His puggish nose was red as well, and a small trickle of blood came from the right nostril. His mouth was slightly open, gasping for air, and he could see that more blood was bleeding out from between his teeth. _

"_Kur-" But even as the image was registering in his mind, Kurt gave him an uncharacteristic shove aside and walked briskly away. A tiny sob wobbled out of his throat and then he disappeared._

_iPod. iPod. That's all._

_Feeling like his feet and heart were made of cement, he grabbed his iPod, right where he knew it would be, and turned back. He walked towards the door, but a flash of red and white caught his vision. Lying on the bench where Finn had put Kurt's clothes was a small, white button-up shirt, stained with red. Finn's stomach lurched. He picked it up, and knew it was unmistakably Kurt's. It was tiny, expensive looking, and the only logical person's item to be stained with mouthblood._

My fault_, Finn thought, picking up the shirt and feeling the smooth fabric on his fingers. _I could have stopped this. I could have just…I could have told them no. It would have been that easy_. But just as the thoughts of guilt were invading his mind, he shook his head._

Why do I even care. It's his fault for joining. He knew what he was up for.

_But even as he chanted it like a mantra, over and over, out of the building, into his car, on the way home. He knew he was wrong. And as he sat down at his computer, typing 'How to get blood out of a white shirt' into google, the actual shirt sitting next to him on the computer desk,he knew he'd have to make up for what he'd done._


	2. Part Two, Dirty Laundry

Okay, some things. One, I guess it will become obvious where there story is, though seasonally, I am freaking lost. Yes, the show is set in Ohio, so I'm assuming they have four seasons. (Ohio-ians are my downstairs neighbors. Good Ole' Michigan.) But when, exactly, all the Glee stuff is happening is very confusing to me. xD Whether it's the beginning of the school year or Mid-April, I can't tell (And I blame California for that. x3) so you can imagine this happening either three months later or however many it takes to get to damn December. I feel like such a winner.

Two, thanks you guy's for all the kind comments so far. Real-life teen drama fiction is in no way my forte, but I'm striving to do it as best I can. (I'm 17, it shouldn't be that difficult, but you'd be surprised.)

And three, I honestly have no idea how long this is gonna go. It could be five chapters and a happy resolution, or a 500 page novel ending with depression and suicide. Though. I'm guessing it'll be more like the first one. xD Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy it. I'm already gearing up for Part two, Medicine Cabinets. So, better get to work on that!

(and five, very important, five, don't let me eat pears. i HATE pears, John Smith... sorry. Had to pop in a Doctor Who reference.)

Love always, Odd. .3.

* * *

Finn Hudson stepped into the bathroom. The door shut snugly behind him and he walked to the tub, pulling the shower knob and running the water, nice and hot. Early December in Ohio was hell. An icy cold hell. Just as he began to tug off his shirt, though, there was a fervent knocking at the door, recognizable only as his mother's. Well. At last she'd learned to knock.

"Finn, honey, we're leaving." Her voice was muffled against the door and the waterfall behind him. Finn was unsurprised. He'd known that she and Burt -that was what he called his mothers boyfriend now, somewhere between Mister Hummel and Daddy- and she had been making plans to go out for a while now, and he'd known they would be leaving on this night at this time for about three weeks. Why his mother still made it such a big deal was a mystery to Finn.

"Yeah, mom. Have fun." He answered nonchalantly, moving aside the curtain -Bright blue with lighter accents, it worked so well with the Bathroom's coloration! according to Kurt/His mother- and stepping in, slowly adjusting the temperature so that he neither boiled nor froze.

"Tap tap, muffle muffle, eleven thirty, muffle muffle pizza, tap tap muffle?"

Finn rolled his eyes. Between the water and his iPod, which he absolutely needed in his showers -who didn't need a soundtrack- her voice was little more than a prattling at the edge of his consciousness. Yes,they'd try to be home by eleven thirty, yes, if he got hungry he would order pizza. Yes, to whatever the last question, most likely irrelevant, was.

There was another tap.

"Muffle muffle sure?"

Finn rolled his eyes. There was an empty box that the soap had gone in lying in the soap dish. he picked it up and tossed it at the door.

"Yeah mom, You can go!" He wasn't shouting in anger, just shouting to get her to go. She really liked Burt, but she had her wavering loyalties sometimes, and it was hard for Finn to explain why Mid-shower psychologist appointments weren't the best ideas. So she said a few more -happy- muffled words and her voice eventually faded, down the hall and away. Finally.

Beside him on the counter outside the shower, his iPod blasted out the old, yet timeless, I Get Knocked Down by Chumbawamba. The classic.

_'I get knocked down! But I get up again! You're never going to keep me down! '_

As he'd been doing since joining New Directions, Finn found himself mentally ushering out parts as the lines of the song played. It was almost second nature at this point, really, and it was nice to have an archive of songs that could combat Rachel's never ending list of show tunes.

_'He drinks a whisky drink  
He drinks a vodka drink,'_

Anyway.

_'He drinks a lager drink  
He drinks a cider drink,'_

He, sure, would get lead male vocals for this song, maybe with Puck beside him. Artie, Matt, and the others could do backup. For the good old 'Oh, Danny Boy's' He would have Rachel, Brittany most likely, and then...

He paused for a moment, running a hand through his hair.

_'He sings the songs that remind him of the good times,'_

No, not Mercedes. Her voice was nice, but not fitting. Santana had a great voice, but it was too gravely. Quinn's was no better. That left him with...

_'He sings the songs that remind him of the better times.'_

Who else. Kurt.

For a moment it felt tremendously wrong, thinking about Kurt in the shower. This, admittedly, was not the first time this had ever happened, but at the same time was not as perverted as it seemed. Sometimes, certain things just...just crossed the mind. It was no one's fault. Really.

Still, in any situation, Kurt plus Shower lead to only one real memory. Finn winced, once again feeling the shame and embarrassment that he had back in September. This was not the first time he'd thought about it, not by a long shot, but every time he looked back in his mind and saw that one image, the blood, the tears, the helplessness, it made him feel sick.

_Drop it. That was in the past. It's over now. Things are different. Waaaay different._

If Finn had done his best to forget the day in Spetember, though, it might as well had been nonexistent to Kurt. At least, that was what Finn assumed, seeing as he never brought it up again. Never mentioned the missing shirt. Brought only one bottle of hair stuff to practice and showered like lightning. The day after the incident, Kurt showed up, all brave and attitude and...Kurt.

Had it even happened?

Finn was sure, if he wanted, he could just forget about that day. But that damn conscience refused to let it go.

The water was running cold now. Finn stepped out, shutting off the ipod -The song came to an abrupt end- and putting on nothing but a pair of gray shorts. Winter it may have been, but damn if his mom didn't leave the house feeling like an oven. The water on his skin was lukewarm as he made his way downstairs and into the kitchen. On nights like these, warm quiet nights at home, Finn liked to just lounge. He had his friends, he had his sports, but sometimes 16 year old boys just wanted to sit at home and chill. After a visit to the fridge, of course.

He might of picked up on it first, really, had he been paying attention. If he'd seen the candle in the front hall, lit and smelling of apples and cinnamon (A pre-Christmas gift from Kurt, seeing as it 'Fit the theme of their cozy little place, isn't that right, so on and so forth.') The way the living room TV was on, which happened time to time, but not on the Local News channel like his mother usually left, but sounding like some Lady Gaga song. Finally, had he opened his eyes and focused on the details like he should of, he would have noticed the boots on the ground, belonging to only one fashionista he knew, and a coat that was far too expensive for anyone in the Hudson family.

But, no. It took literally strolling into the living room and seeing the small brunette on the couch, completely engrossed in the 'Telephone' music video to realize exactly what those last muffled words his mother had spoken meant.

While he should have been surprised, though, for a quick moment he could only take in the image of Kurt completely and totally...not Kurt. Not to say he wasn't the prim, proper diva-looking kid he saw at school every day, no, he was fairly sure that was Kurt's default setting. But something about the way he was sitting, curled up into the corner of the couch, legs half folded at the ankle, hands at his side, made Finn have a double take. And he was right. A few strands of loose hair fell across the smaller boy's forehead and, to Finn's most definite surprise, he was dressed in little more than a nice Button-down blue shirt and a pair of Skinny Jeans (Probably all labeled and expensive and fancy, but incredibly casual all the same.)

This was something few had ever seen, Finn realized as he stared. This was Kurt on a night in.

Of course, all of that changed when Finn's light movement got caught in Kurt's peripheral vision a few seconds later, and nearly launched the smaller boy off the couch and out the door. The kitten-like squeal that accompanied... did not help. Within three seconds, relaxed Kurt had reverted to proper Kurt, Hair fixed, legs neatly crossed, face slowly losing it's original shock expression into one of calmness.

Then, slower, embarrassment. Only when Kurt's eye's flicked away from Finn and down to the tv and a light blush crossed his face, did Finn remember he was standing there half naked.

Again.

Damn it, fate.

"Ah, uhm Kurt. What are, what are you doing here."

He knew he had nothing to be embarrassed about, all things were the same as they'd been months ago in the Locker-room. But in plain view of Kurt's slightly widened eyes, in his house, living room, territory, it felt wrong for some reason.

"You're mother wanted me to come over to," he made quotation marks with his fingers, "keep you company.' She _just_ told you. Didn't you hear her?"

His voice was perplexed. Fittingly, really.

"No, not really. I was getting in the shower."

Wrong thing to say. The red on Kurt's cheeks spread, taking his face in a bright pink flush. Despite the fact that pretty much this entire situation was Finn's fault, he couldn't hide his unhappiness at the fact that Kurt didn't even try to hide his interest.

Not the time. Not the time.

Finn rolled his eyes and walked away, feeling more stupid than anything. Of course it was only a matter of time until his mother tried to bring 'Her men' together. She was absolutely wild about Kurt, and it showed in all the little ways his house was changing. New Shower curtains, new mugs, little things that his mother had come to call "Kurt-icies." She loved him like she loved a labradoodle puppy and couldn't for the life of her understand why Finn did not.

Of course, explaining to her that her maybe-future-step-son was interested in more than brotherly love was out of the question for Finn. He couldn't imagine that conversation, or what it would do to the family. Keeping the entire thing under wraps was ridiculous, but effective.

Out of a laundry basket he pulled a plain shirt and pulled it over his bare skin, which did the trick of calming him down. But the question stood all the same. What next? His mother would have a coronary if she heard that Finn left Kurt in the house all by his lonesome. But spending the next three or so (Or, what if, the night? It wasn't unimaginable that his mom or Burt would have a little too much to drink and not want to be left alone or...ew. Ew. Moving on.) He could have just gone upstairs. Pretend that he forgot. Something of that nature.

Or. Or he could just suck it up and make the best of a bad situation. The fact that this was the least enjoyable option gave Finn a small pang of guilt,and set his mind in what he had to do. He wavered in the decision between a beer just to calm the nerves or a soda, and eventually grabbed two Diet Cokes before heading into the living room where Kurt, like a proper little statue, was watching E news. Until Finn exhaled of course. Then it flicked right over to Espn.

Smooth.

"Thirsty?" He asked, holding out the other can. Kurt, looking relatively surprised that Finn had even come back, nodded and took it, popping the little silver top and taking a quick sip.

As Finn settled into the other side of the couch, he couldn't ignore Kurt eyeing him. At first he figured it might just be surprise. But after about thirty seconds of feeling the boy's eyes examining his shoulder, Finn had to turn to him.

Kurt's left eyebrow raised.

"I'm sorry," he said, turning to face Finn. Finn braced himself, for what he wasn't sure. Kurt was unpredictable like that. "But you're wearing a shirt,"-Sweet Jesus- "And you didn't go upstairs to your room. As far as I know, there's only a hamper of clothes waiting to be done in the kitchen. Please don't tell me you're wearing a used one?"

Finn Blinked. He wasn't sure what he'd expected from Kurt, but that wasn't it. It was almost funny, really. He held back a relieved smile.

"Is it that obvious?"

Kurt smiled a little, looking a fraction more relaxed. "That, and the fact that you smell like a foot mixed with cheap shampoo."

Finn sighed, rolling his eyes. "Does it bother you that much?" He could go upstairs and get a nice clean shirt and just make Kurt happy. Or he could stay as he was, about as comfortable as he was going to get. Kurt crossed his arms, looking displeased. He turned to look back at the Tv.

"I guess not, no." He said it with a cocky twitch of the head that told Finn that no meant yes. Still, Finn wasn't sure how much he liked getting fashion tips from another guy in his house.

A strained silence fell over the room as Finn became absorbed in sports scores and replays and whatnot, but was unable to completely ignore Kurt, sitting there looking about as interested in this as Finn assumed he'd be in watching, like, The Sound of Music. He just didn't know, though, how to re-comfortable the situation. He was just opening his mouth, hoping that something helpful would climb down from his brain stem and off his tongue, when Kurt shifted and got up.

"I'm going to the bathroom." He announced, making his way towards the stairs. Finn nodded, more relieved that he had a second to try and make this a decent night than just sputter until something helpful came out. He ran a hand through his still damp hair.

Tonight, if nothing else, was going to be interesting


	3. Part Three, Medicinal Value

Okay, let me just say now that updates won't always come this rapidfire. I have literally not written anyhting for a month and have an overwhelming amount of inspiration for this story. I don't know how long it will last, but I can say with certainty that the story won't be done by the end of the week. (But hey, I have a general direction for where the story is going and a reachable goal in lengh! Yaay!)

Anyway, thanks for all the kind reviews and faves, they make my day so much better. .3. Someone told me I wrote Finn really well, so I decided to go and screw everything up by writing from Kurt's persective. I once said I could write a 400 page thesis on Kurt. Probably still true. But trying to get into that disturbingly wonderful mindframe was a suprising challenge. I hope I did well. ^^;

Also, I have litterally made up an interior for Finn's house out of like, Ballads, home, and my imagination. Some of it's probably not completely legit. It's a fanfiction, bear with me. xD

So, that's all I have. I don't know when you can expect part four (Currently under the codename Double Take. .3.) but it is being planned. (Drama! Tears! Unintentional Innuendos!) Meanwhile, though, I still need to graduate and stuff, so I have a lot on my plate. Like that's ever stopped me before.

...I write too much. I need a blog. xD

Enjoy!

* * *

The varnished wooden banister squeaked under Kurt's hand as he headed upstairs. Sweaty palms, he knew, were to blame. This wasn't too surprising, however, considering Kurt was just about ready to puke. It wasn't like being around Finn made him lovesick or anything, no, not even he was that cliché. It more about the fact that Finn was actually giving him a chance. Had Finn asked him to lie to Carol and his father, saying they'd had a fun night playing cards and watching wrestling and, uh, doing manly friend things, he happily would have with a wink and a smile. But no, Finn was perfectly content to sit on the other side of the couch and let there be only awkward silences and letting the night stretch out.

And stretch out it had.

He honestly didn't know how long he was going to be able to sit on that couch watching fat old men rant on about how So-and-So had putted X amount of birds, And how well the Blue Jays did against the Vatticans. For a kid who had been raised by, quite possibly, the biggest sports fan in Lima, it couldn't have bored him more. He hoped with Finn giving him this extra chance and all, that he would at least understand what it must feel like to watch people running with assorted sticks and balls in exaggerated ovals.

For the sake of his sanity.

There was more at stake here, though, than just a long night of boring replays. This was his second chance.

Before the whole parental set up thing, he and Finn had been friends. Ish, at least. He'd helped with the Quinn situation, with the skin care, and had never really given Finn a reason to not like him. In return, Finn had always done his best to keep him, or at least his clothes, from getting dumpster dipped, or tried to give a heads up when a slushie facial was coming his way.

But since Kurt had stomped on the invisible line from 'Friend' to 'Creepy kid who hoped to date his future step brother' Finn had all but abandoned him. Not that Kurt blamed him. Looking back at it, he knew he might as well had thrown himself off a bridge, just hoping Finn would have a helicopter and know to rescue him. Love was blind, indeed.

Things _were_ improving though. Finn could stand being within ten feet of Kurt without flinching, but that was about as good as things had gone. In short, there was still a lot of ground to cover.

Which was why tonight was such a big deal. Ironically, Kurt had not invited himself over, and instead acted flattered as Carol asked him to have a good time with her boy. Kurt had decided to take a step back from his own scheming, as it seemed the best laid plans of mice and Kurt often ended up blowing back up in his face. He decided, rather than trying to pan out the events for his best outcome, he'd just let things happen as they would.

He'd dressed down about as much as he could without looking homeless, tried to keep up that confident but not cocky air that he always had with Mercedes, and stayed at least three feet away so that he didn't look like he was invading any personal space. And while Finn hadn't run from him or sprinkled him with Holy Water just yet, the awkward silences were really no better.

…He really did have to pee though.

Kurt had been to the Hudson house many times before, and knew his way around quite well. (While Finn's mother loved having them over, his father still referred to their own house as, quote, a big old bachelor pad with a salon in the basement.)

He had never really noticed, though, just how vanilla their bathroom was. It was small, crowded, with the things it needed to be considered a bathroom, but aside from the curtains he had 'suggested' Carol get, it was almost completely plain.

As Kurt turned to go, he found himself looking in the mirror. He fixed his hair, tried to wipe the nervousness from his face, gave himself a mini pep talk. He was stalling by now, but didn't care. In that sense, just as he was leaving, a thought struck his mind. It was something his dad had said a while ago when he'd been telling a story about his old girlfriend, how he figured out she was cheating on him by finding a can of odd-brand shaving cream in her medicine cabinet.

"Small plain spaces make us curious, you know. They make us want to know more about the people who own them. The inside of another person's medicine cabinet could tell you everything about them."

On a whim, Kurt opened the window in front of him, wondering what he'd find. Antidepressants? Zit creams? Inorganic facial moisturizers? All frightening prospects.

But the Hudson medicine cabinet was as plain as the rest of the bathroom. Toothpaste, hand lotion, a razor. All about as interesting as Nascar.

Kurt closed the cabinet and stepped out into the hallway.

Going back downstairs, though, would have to wait. Kurt was a man on a mission. When Finn had come back from the kitchen wearing a shirt Kurt distinctively remembered seeing him in at least a day ago, the red flag of bad fashion decisions had been raised. And while apparently Finn was in no mood to go and fix the situation for himself, Kurt would happily do it for him.

It was sort of funny, really, how Finn's room was the only one that Kurt had never been in. He supposed at one point he would have been welcomed in without question. Now though, with all the family and crush drama, Finn kept his room so guarded that Kurt couldn't take three steps towards it without triggering an alarm. Still. He was just getting a clean shirt. It was an act of public service. He opened the door and flicked on the light.

And tried not to laugh.

Finn hadn't been lying when he said he lived in a closet. (A phrase with such a double meaning that it had kept Kurt up many a night.) The room was small, not only in comparison to Kurt's basement, but pretty much against any humanely sized room. The wallpaper really did have cowboys on it. And aside from a few trophies on his dresser and posters hanging above his bed, the room was as bad as the bathroom.

In his heart of hearts, Kurt would have loved to delve ankle deep into Finn's closet and compose an outfit for him so stunning Finn would go blind just looking at it. Of course, actually doing that would drop him so far on Finn's crazy meter that he'd never be able to get back up. So instead he shook his head and crossed the room, reaching into the closet and pulling out a plain, light blue Old Navy t-shirt. It was a smack in the face to Kurt's fashion sense, but he shook it off.

And that could have been it. He did, in fact, make it halfway out the door before another look around the room pulled him back in. His father's words echoed in his ears.

_Small plain spaces make us curious. They make us want to know more about the people who own them…_

Didn't they just.

_A ten second look. That's all. This room could stand next to a seven year olds and no one would be able to tell the difference. Finn had to have put self-expression in here somewhere._

Telling himself that he was just looking for a better shirt, he nervously reached over and took hold of the first drawer. Socks and boxers. Riveting. Oh so accidently his hand knocked a pair of socks aside. A picture of Quinn was uncovered. Adorable. A slight arm twitch moved the socks over again. Twenty bucks. Kurt was just about to reach in deeper when he caught himself. No wonder Finn thought he was half insane. Maybe he just really was. He rolled his eyes at his insanity when he accidentally –real this time- moved a pile of plaid boxers aside, revealing a crumpled piece of white material. Kurt raised an eyebrow and reached in, blinking in confusion as the fabric felt soft under his fingers. Expensive? What expensive shirt was Finn keeping in his sock drawer?

As he pulled it out, he saw three bright pink splotches on it, a sign of poor bleaching, and somewhere in the back of his mind something sparked. He uncrumpled it and put it out in front of him. It was is size. His stomach lurched.

The first thing he remembered, oddly enough, was Jane Luda. Two years ago, his father had brought her home around the time of Kurt's birthday and she had been so charmed to meet him that she offered to take him out for a birthday shopping spree. Kurt had thought his father had found a diamond in the rough with Jane. Happily, they'd went out to all of Kurt's favorite places to shop, but unhappily, he found himself with one of the most tasteless, cheap, and blatantly stupid women he'd ever met. And he'd known Rachel Berry at that point.

After literally four hours of 'Uh, Curtis, I don't know, the budget…' Kurt had found himself with one new shirt. It was hardly anything special and, in his opinion, a waste of money. But had he not bought something, he felt Jane would have cried. He did not like her.

Luckily his dad soon saw the light and dropped Jane on her ass. The shirt stayed in Kurt's extensive closet for two years until he needed something, just something, to be able to sweat into.

The next memory, though, didn't have such a happy ending.

His stomach flipped as he remembered the day, the way he'd been just that helpless, that weak, and how Finn had just watched, eyes empty and detached. His knuckles turned white as they gripped the stained fabric. Within seconds he found himself walking down the stairs and in the hallway outside the living room.

As he was about to go in and say God knew what to Finn, the other boy turned to him.

"You get lost?" he asked with a smile.

Kurt was taken aback by is friendly tone. It was the most relaxed Finn had sounded all night. Kurt tossed the blue shirt over to him.

"Here. That shirt smells like three-day-old mildew."

Finn didn't hide his embarrassment as he took in the fact that Kurt had been in his room. But after a second he just sighed and nodded back.

"Thanks."

Kurt moved another inch closer, only to turn away as Finn eyed him and changed shirts.

"Hey, so," Finn said as he popped his head though the top, "I ordered pizza. You eat pepperoni, right? Cause…well. I want tonight…to not be so bad."

Kurt lifted his chin. "Bad? How?"

"Like, us sitting here like the two unhappiest people on the earth because we have to be near each other. It's not like we can't just hang out, right?"

Kurt's grip loosened and the white shirt fell to the floor. His heart beat a little faster, fear and anger fading.

"…Right."

He stepped into the living room and sat down. A hush fell over them as Kurt's mind whizzed around all these sudden events, but the silence wouldn't last.

"So what do you think about Rachel's suggestion? The Sound Of Music? My mom made me watch that once. I lasted a half an hour before wanting to die."

"It's not that bad, really." Kurt answered, relived to have such an easy topic, "You just have to look deeper into the story…"

They chatted for a little while, and Kurt found himself happier and happier. When they weren't trying to act straight and unhomophobic, they really did get along well. Once the pizza arrived they had to move closer to be able to reach (Kurt would kill someone if they tried to eat food on his furniture, but on Finn's couch…) but neither really seemed to notice. When they moved onto television, they found a mutual distaste for most Scifi, a lot of the history stuff (Kurt found Finn's unrelenting interest in Desert Storm so heartwarming) and soon settled on a replaying of an old Parkour competition. Kurt nibbled on his third slice of pizza. (Sue would kill him. He didn't care.)

"Guys running around and jumping off of things shirtless? Let the record show you picked the show, Finn Hudson."

Finn, somewhere on his sixth slice, (Damn his metabolism.) laughed and nodded.

Kurt blinked. Finn Hudson laughing at a gay joke without discomfort? It was either a sign of the apocalypse or Valhalla.

"Oh, hey, I just got a text from my mom," Finn said as his pocket vibrated. "There was an accident on the freeway, Traffic's a bitch and a half. They don't know when they'll be home...Joy."

Kurt, Full of pizza and comfort, relaxed into the couch.

"Tell them we'll be fine. Don't want her panicking over nothing, right?"

Finn nodded and texted back, reminding Kurt of the fact that he, too, had a phone. He checked it, and saw a text from Mercedes from an hour and a half ago.

"Omg good luck boy. Id run if I were you. Keep me updated."

Oh, right, he had been panicking about tonight, hadn't he? He almost laughed out loud.

'All is good.' He wrote back. 'All is looking good.'

xXx

It was 1:34am when Carole Hudson unlocked to door to her house. She sighed guiltily. Between the long dinner, the movie, and the traffic, she was very late and expected her son to be displeased. Ushering Burt and herself inside, she expected to be met with an unhappy bark from her son.

Instead, she was met with a warm quiet house, dark except for the small flickering light outside the living room door. She stepped in, taking off her boots and inching inside the living room. What she saw made her cheeks blush and her eyes water the slightest bit.

"Burt," She whispered quietly, turning to her man. "Burt, come here. Shh." He looked at her confusedly but followed. In a moment couldn't hide the smile on his face.

Both boys were asleep on the couch, Finn in the crook of the couches corner and Kurt using Finn's shoulder as a pillow. The remains of a pizza were abandoned on the coffee table and the tv was blaring something about Crazy December Sales. The moment breathed precious.

Carol took out her phone and silently snapped a picture, blue and a little blurry.

"You think they had fun?" She whispered as she took off her coat.

"Yeah," Burt answered, moving into the room and shaking Kurt's shoulder. "Yeah I do."

Kurt, half asleep, stirred and blinked at his father's face. As Burt whispered it was time to go, Kurt nodded blindly, still surrounded by a haze of sleep. If he saw where or how he'd been sleeping, he gave no attention to it. As he slipped on his boots and coat, Carol kissed Burt goodbye and gave Kurt a small hug, then waved as he stepped out the door and towards the car.

After the Hummels were gone, she woke up Finn and shoo'd him up to his own room. She cleaned up the mild mess the boys had made, turned off the Tv, and jumped as she heard her boy stumble.

"Finn," she called out, moving through the 1 Am dark. "You okay?"

"Yeah," He answered in a haze of sleep, and she heard him a moment later traipsing up the stairs.

She never saw his face as he picked up what he'd stumbled on. She never saw his eyes widen as awakening flooded in, and didn't see him mouth the word 'No,' softly. All she knew was that when she went up to check up on him a few minutes later, he was sound asleep with a small white shirt next to him on his pillow. She thought nothing of it.


	4. Part Four, And How

After the amazing triumph of life that was Saturday night, it sort of stood to reason that the next couple of days might pale in comparison. Sunday, Kurt spent most of the his time staring at his phone, waiting for anyone to call. Had Finn called he would have died of happiness, but that didn't happen, and he didn't expect it to. He mostly wondered what happened to Mercedes, seeing as she hadn't really replied since the night before. He texted her once, asking her what she was doing, but got no reply. He had other options of course, Tina, Brittany, and so on, but it just turned out to be one of those incredibly lazy Sundays.

Most of his day, though, was spent thinking about the night before. It was stupid, he knew, nothing special had happened. But the general fact that he'd had fun with Finn was enough to keep him going.

There was only one blip in the memory. That shirt. What was Finn doing with it? Kurt vaguely remembered leaving it behind that day in the locker room –he was kind of in a hurry- but couldn't understand why Finn would have taken it. If he'd had the intention of giving it back, why didn't he just? Was he embarrassed about the stains? Because, really, that wasn't Finn's fault…

He didn't let himself think farther about it than that. Maybe if he and Finn got together again, he'd bring it up. He didn't want to sound like some creepy stalker. (Though Finn was the one with the shirt. Who was creepy then?) He supposed the next time fate brought the two together, he'd try and mention it. Though, getting them together alone was so much more of a challenge than it sounded.

Sigh.

The night before had been fun. But it hadn't fixed much.

But that was Sunday, and now it was Monday morning. Kurt tried to keep his eyes fixed on the entrances of McKinley, but he wasn't fifteen seconds out of the car before he could see a gorilla-like shape moving towards him with disturbing speed. Before he could pull a sharp left, a not-so-friendly grip on his shoulder made him jump. Taking a deep breath he turned, only to see a cold-hearted jock grinning at him on the other side. The feeling of dread he got every morning at about this time washed over him. So much for fingers crossed for Finn.

"Hey, faggot," Puck said, catching up to them. Kurt took a moment to consider bolting, but decided it was easier just to let these things happen. It was freezing outside, and he only hoped no one had tossed in a half-full cup of coffee in the dumpster. It wouldn't be the first time.

As they neared the dumpster, Kurt began to tug at his jacket, wondering if he could somehow get it off before getting tossed. No dice, Puck grabbed his other arm and Kurt closed his eyes, readying himself to be airborne. Just as he was though, the ever-so-jolly voice of Will Schuester floated over his freezing ears and his eyes blinked open.

"Noah? Mister Rutherford, Mister Chang?" Mr. Schu called out, waving his hand. "I need you guys for a sec, okay? Glee stuff. Kurt, you can come too, if you want."

Puck nodded cheerfully, but his eyes were cold as they met Kurt's. His grip relaxed.

"Lucky break." He said with a shove. He and the other two animals moved past, and Kurt kept pace with them until they were within the building. At that point he heel-toed it in the other direction and darted like a startle squirrel to his locker where Mercedes was waiting.

"Hey," he said, panting a little, "Where were you yesterday?"

"Upstate family thing," she sighed, turning her lock quickly. "So how was the...meeting?"

Kurt couldn't hide the blush spreading across his cheeks. He tried not to giggle.

"It was...it was good. We had fun." At Mercedes meticulously raised eyebrow, he added "Good, clean fun."

"You do realize you're redder than the cardigan you're wearing?" She asked, grabbing a book and leaning back. Kurt took a moment to take in the Rose-red shirt he was wearing before running his fingers across his bangs.

"It's just the cold." He hissed, unsure why the affection was making him act all googly eyed.

"Sure it is. Listen," Mercedes placed a hand on his shoulder, "It's good that he's not treating you like a freak anymore. Just don't bite off anymore than you can chew, alright?"

Kurt absentmindedly fixed his bangs again, knowing just how right she was.

"Alright." he said in a breath, gathering the things he needed for first period. "I'll do my best."

"Puppy love is great," Mercedes said moving away from him, "But if it ends badly, it can sting. Trust me, I know."

"As does my windshield." He said, smiling to let her know it was okay. She grinned back and waved. He wouldn't see her again until lunch. But he would see Finn soon. Almost too soon for him to prepare.

Finn had Kurt's first hour, his fifth hour, and Glee. That was roughly three or so hours he would see him a day, three and a half if he sat near him at lunch. With the added time they would spend together with their parents, that was about five hours of opportunities he had to corner him and ask. The shirt wasn't always the forefront of his mind, but Kurt found as he tried to push it farther and farther back, the closer it came. By the time he walked into Spanish I, he could have blurted out fourteen different questions. But as Finn smiled at him warmly, his brain turned to pudding.

"No dumpster dip today?" Finn asked, making room for Kurt to sit down. Kurt slid in, making sure there was no touching of the shirts or otherwise.

"Nope. Or slushie facials. I'm two for two."

Both boys smiled, laughed a little, and then...blank. Out of topics of interest. White noise. Kurt coughed a little, having only one other thing to say. Luckily, as he struggled for words, Schuester walked in talking about Yo Soy's and Estas. Kurt exhaled hard.

The rest of the day blurred by like a warped dream, nothing memorable or significant, nothing but short replies to questions and the casual exchange of words between Sue and Schu. Oh, the predictable world.

So Kurt was looking forward to Glee, hoping it would give him a little time to just unwind and relax. Unfortunately, that was not the case.

Schu was as pumped up as usual, raving on about anew idea of trying to 'break through' with 'smart harmonies' and the such. Kurt didn't care much about that stuff, knowing he had his own harmonies and stuff to work with. Schu could drone on for hours about what it meant to sing and dance and be, but it all really came down to what song they were going to sing.

Schu finished his speech. The last words he spoke were "Fireflies by Owl City. Kurt and Finn, you'll sing lead."

Kurt's head snapped up, not ready for that. His face flashed red and he looked at Finn, who had that look of helpless embarrassment that came when he and Kurt were grouped in public.

"Mr. Schu, we've been over this."

Schuester rolled his eyes. "You're not singing to him, Finn. You're singing with him. " -a chorus of snickers.- "It's all about harmony."

So. Bluntly, the king's mind was made up. Kurt and Finn took the sheets of music, as did everyone else. After three run troughs, though, it became obvious that it just wasn't going to sound right. Kurt sighed as Schu brought them to a close once again.

"Finn. You could at least try."

"I am, Mister Schu. It just doesn't work."

"No, it will work. you're just not holding onto the words enough, you're syncing with Kurt oddly. Try being rough. Again."

Again, fail, halfway through the song, and an increasingly annoyed Schu rubbed his eyes.

"Finn. Concentrate. Kurt can't be lighter if you're being light. You have to be stronger. You have to be harder so Kurt can be softer."

Like a speeding arrow, Kurt caught it. His entire face flushed a red so deep that he might as well had been bleeding out his pores. Finn was faring no better, eyes staring blankly at the wall, looking like he was having an out of body experience. In two and a half seconds, Puck let out a disturbingly appropriate bark of laughter, and a rush of giggles followed. Even Schu blushed as he realized what he said.

And so ended another fine day at William Mckinley. On, quite possibly, the worst note presented. Kurt grabbed his things and booked it so fast that Finn didn't find him until he was turning on his car.

"Kurt!" Finn called, tapping his car window. Kurt jumped, but rolled down the window all the same. He expected some sort of reprimand for...for being picked to sing with him? He didn't know. But as Finn puffed an icy breath into the car, his voice was friendly, relaxed.

"Kurt, I was...I was wondering if I could come over. I have, uh, some homework stuff."

Kurt, caught fairly off guard, nodded blankly.

"You know where I live, right?"

"Yeah."

"Then you can follow me, sure." His knuckles were white as they gripped the steering wheel.

Kurt was relieved as Finn nodded, walking towards his car parked a few spaces away. It would be one thing being in his room together, he had no idea how to handle that. But the silence that would no doubt follow them to his house would drive him up a wall. He was nearly shaking.

Still. Turning into his driveway and seeing Finn pull up behind him, crawling out of his car with his backpack over his shoulder, it was like something out of a dream. An awkward, scary, but not exactly nightmarish dream.

Head down, he unlocked his door and made his way to the basement, no stops in between. he wasn't being much of a good host, he knew, but he was honestly just panicking. If Finn was honestly offended at not being given a tour, he revealed nothing. As they settled in downstairs, Finn turned to look at him.

"You get this whole thing to yourself?"

"Yeah." Kurt said, silently regretting never going through with all that redecorating talk.

"Makes my room look like a hole in the ground."

"No." Kurt breathed, remembering the tiny room and silently agreeing. "Your room has...charm."

"My room belongs to a six year old."

Kurt shrugged. "A charming six year old?"

Finn nodded, looking unbothered, besides the fact that Kurt had called him charming and had admitted to being in his room. So things were going well then.

"So. About earlier. The song. I had nothing to do with Schuester's pick-"

"No, no, I figured. You looked about as ready to die as I was. It's cool. Schu can be an idiot sometime."

"Yeah, he really can. But it's better than no Glee, right?"

Finn rubbed his hands together, looking distracted.

"Yeah. Yeah. But, uh, I wanted to talk to you for a reason. Like, alone so we wouldn't be distracted."

Kurt's heart fluttered. Then he quelled it, doubting it was going to be an oncoming make out session.

"Could you hand me my backpack?" Finn asked, easing into the couch. Kurt leaned over, handing him the pack.

"So," Finn said, digging into his bag. he moved some things around and Kurt stared in interest.

"Saturday was fun, like, just hang out with a friend fun. I mean, since mom and Burt got together, I've been really awkward around you, cause, erh, I mean. You know."

Kurt nodded. And how.

"But Saturday made me think that things didn't have to be so bad. But when I was going to my room...I...I." He let out a big puff of air. "Kurt, did you find this?"

And he held up the small white shirt.

* * *

I KNOW RIGHT.

Another update. Kill me.

But honestly, I probably won't be able to post until Wednesday+, so I figured I'd give you all some filler to gnaw on. I honestly hate this. I really do. But if I combined it with the extra fun-fun that comes in part five, I almost feel like it would have brought the rest of the story down.

So I'm sorry. .D.

But Wednesday! Wednesday should be fun. And it should be nice and long, so you'll at least have that to look forward to. And another Finn Pov! 8D

Snerk.


	5. Part Five, Total Eclipse

Finn wasn't sure what he'd expected. Not the silence that came so soon. Tears, he mused, might be shed, maybe there would be some finger pointing. Admittedly, he was thinking more along the lines of a soap opera when all this truth came out, so when Kurt just sort of eyed the shirt with a nod, Finn wasn't sure where to go. The shirt had been with him nigh- constantly for the past two days, and the fabric was familiar against his hands. Kurt was watching him from a couple of feet away, his face suddenly sullen.

Finally, after the silence had stretched, Kurt nodded a little more, and his voice eeked out with a 'Yeah.'

Finn, feeling like he was telling a child his puppy died, leaned forward.

"And you…you know what shirt this is?" His stomach was tying itself in knots. How long had he told himself just to forget it? Just to let it go? Why now did he even have to bring it out into the open? Well actually, yeah, he knew. The shirt hadn't magically floated downstairs and right outside the living room. Finn didn't know why Kurt had it, or why he hadn't said anything, but the evidence was disturbed.

Maybe now it was just time to settle things.

Kurt nodded again, his face looking more and more stiff, like it was carved out of ice. Really, a more uncomfortable situation couldn't be imagined by Finn.

"I, uh, I took the shirt home to clean it. I didn't know if it meant anything to you, But it only made it worse. I didn't want to like, offend you. Sorry." The shirt dropped to the floor. White noise invaded, before Kurt moved closer and picked it up, investigating the off-color splotches dotted haphazardly around it.

"What did you try?" Kurt asked, not looking away, not meeting Finn's eyes.

"Uhm, a few things. Peroxide, Dish soap, regular soap…"

Three winces from Kurt, and Finn had to smile.

"Sorry, I'm no good with that kind of stuff. My mom's the person who does laundry around the house…"

Kurt nodded and moved closer, sitting next to Finn. Finn noticed how Kurt always tried to keep apart from him, even though when they did sit close, Kurt was so much more relaxed. Finn shifted 'accidentally' and their sides touched. Kurt gripped the shirt tighter before letting out a breath.

"This isn't about the shirt." He said.

"I didn't think so."

Silence.

"It wasn't as bad as you think." Kurt said, not looking at him. "It's not like that was the first time anything like that happened. I'm just sorry you had to see me like that."

"No." Finn said, turning to him. "No, I should have done something. I was a douche bag for letting them do that to you."

"No you weren't," Kurt said, sounding more like a supporting friend than a victim. "What that would have done to your reputation. It wasn't worth it."

"Yes it was!" Finn surprised himself with the bark. Kurt's eyes widened.

How could he feel like that? Did he really feel that worthless? Did he really think Finn's high school persona was more important than his own safety?

"I don't know why you aren't mad about this." He laughed, voice dry. "They grabbed you, threw you like you were just a piece of garbage…You were bleeding… and nobody cared."

Shame made him burn from his ears to his toes.

"And I just watched."

This time, Kurt did look at him. His eyes were big and gentle.

"I can't say I've ever been treated worse. But I couldn't just expect you to rush in and be my…my knight in shining armor. That's just how people are."

""I was wrong though. I know Puck, I could have stopped him. And I didn't."

"No one expected more of you."

"I did! You're my friend, and I just let them make you bleed. And you just seemed so accepting of it. You're eyes were so dead, like, oh, you know, daily chore. I hated myself after it."

"Finn, really." Kurt put up a hand and placed it on Finn's leg. It was hot through the jean fabric. Finn didn't care. "The worst part was you seeing me, really. I know I must have looked terrible, all bloody with my hair messed up. It didn't hurt, I just bit my tongue."

Finn blanked. Really, honestly, just blanked out. His mouth opened, but nothing came out. After a second he had to hang his head, stopping short of grinning.

"Kurt 'till the end." He said in a hoarse laugh. "More about looks than the fact that you'd have a bruised abdomen for a week after." The situation was so completely unfunny, it was funny.

"Nope, just my arm. I had plenty of sweaters, though."

Finn paused. It was so good, getting all of this out into the open. But that nagging guilt that he'd carried every day since was still there, still telling him what a bad person he was.

"You were bleeding."

"Just my tongue. And my nose, a little."

"And I just let that happen."

"Finn."

"No, I did! You don't get it, Kurt." Finn's heart was pounding inside his chest, and he could almost hear the other half of him screaming 'No!' but he didn't care. The Floodgates were opening.

" Have you ever seen anyone who looks…who looks vulnerable? Helpless? Like they just need your help?"

"I didn't need your help."

"I know, I know." Liar. "But yes you did. Not just then, but…but always. I mean, I'm not saying that you aren't your own person and you're not like, confidant and all because you are. You're more of a man than I am sometimes. But it's like, half the time I see you, you look like you're about to cry. And I hate that. Like, ever since that time with Puck and the lockers… I want to protect you sometimes Kurt."

Never had a more disturbingly gushy sentence left Finn's lips. Even as he said them, he had to ask himself if he was in some sort of Lifetime movie. His face burned red as he said it, and the very idea of someone other than Kurt hearing him say that made him want to puke.

It was almost a moment of peace, though, like there was this thing he'd been carrying around with him since he'd first seen Kurt. He reminded Finn, in some ways, like the little bird he'd found when he was six. It was just a baby and not able to take care of its self, and was more or less dog food for the neighbor's Rottweiler. Something about seeing that animal, something that wasn't ready to defend itself from the world, made Finn want to care for it.

A feeling that was mirrored tenfold when he saw Kurt.

With his mother's help, he'd nursed the little baby bird back to health, and soon it outgrew its cardboard box. He liked it, caring for another thing, giving it a chance. One day the bird would go on, eating worms and getting a little bird girlfriend and having a little bird family, but at that point Finn was responsible for it. And he thrived on that responsibility.

Of course, Kurt wasn't a bird, and could probably go through life with a few bumps and bruises perfectly on his own. But when Finn looked at Kurt sometimes, all he could see was that vulnerable little animal, all but asking to get eaten. All he wanted to do was help it. Hold it. Make it better.

He turned to Kurt dejectedly, not knowing what to expect. The other boy's eyes were rimming with tears.

"You don't need to protect me." He said, his voice a light whisper.

Finn looked back, relief lapping at him like wave son the beach.

He could see the bird again. No feathers, no protection. Something for him to care for.

"I want to."

And then everything went to shit.

It happened so fast Finn almost didn't register it. All he knew was that one minute, he was bearing his soul to a person who had just zoomed past the friendship line and landed squarely in that gaping open space marked with a question mark, and the next thing he knew, there was an abrasive pain in his nose, and he felt Kurt's lips on his own.

"No!"

Despite everything, all the feelings and bird metaphors and responsibility, Finn had to push away. And because Kurt was the one who had initiated the kiss, everything fell apart that much faster. Finn, on his feet instantly, covered his mouth with his hand, feeling like he'd just done something very, very wrong.

Had he taken more than a second to process it, he'd know that everything he did from the moment they'd touched was wrong. He didn't really notice how his arm had crashed into Kurt's abdomen, pushing him away, and how fast he'd grabbed his backpack, ready to run. He stopped himself short there, though, looking at Kurt who looked almost too shocked to be hurt. Almost.

"Finn. I'm so sorry." Kurt said, staring at him with giant green eyes. It was a smack in the face, the fact that Kurt felt responsible. Could Finn do nothing right?

"No." Finn said, hand still cupping his mouth.

"No, no, no, no, no."

Kurt turned away, this time, real tears streaming down his face. He looked absolutely ashamed of himself, and the familiar feeling of guilt plagued Finn once more.

"_You should have done something to stop this!"_

"Kurt, no! I didn't mean it like that! I mean, I mean yeah I did, but no. I'ts not- I don't-"

"It's fine," Kurt said, his voice even higher than usual, trying to stop himself from more tears.

"That was stupid. I was stupid for thinking that."

"No you're not! Damn it Kurt, I like you! I like you more than I know what to do with! But I don't know how!"

He'd been backing up slowly, mistake again, as he spoke, and when Kurt turned to look at him it was clear his sentiment wasn't hitting home. Finn told himself to calm down, before he too became hysterical.

"Kurt. I didn't mean it like that, really." Kurt looked away. " I like you. I like you a lot. And every time you look like you're hurt I want to smack someone for making you frown. But I don't know how to care about you…that way."

He began to leave, not expecting a reply.

"I'm sorry."

Heart beating like a jackhammer, Finn bolted upstairs and outside. What the hell had just happened? He'd come in, expecting to talk things over with Kurt, hoping to end on a friendly note and live their lives. What caused him to say all that stuff –true as it was- he couldn't fathom. It felt great, sure, letting it all spill like a burst pipe, but what would happen to him now? He'd hurt Kurt, bad, worse than he was probably able to imagine, and had no idea how far this would go. What would happen when Kurt got his confidence back? It wasn't often that Kurt did his flirty little touches in the hallway or in class, but it happened. And now that Kurt knew that Finn cared in that way that was more than a friend and less than a lover, what would that do to them? In Finn's mind, gears were shifting.

What if Carol found out?

Or Puck?

He revved his car engine, peeling out of the way of the Hummel house and driving away. He caught his reflection in the rearview. He looked like he'd seen a ghost.

Maybe it was for the better. Maybe it just needed to be said. Finn Hudson was gay. There.

…Nope.

Even hearing himself think it was wrong. Thinking about another guy like that, kissing, touching…It still didn't feel like that was who he was. But how did that work with Kurt who, when Finn saw him, made him feel like something so much more than a friend?

He didn't know. Nothing made sense right now. He just wanted to get home and not think about it.

So of course fate would have it that everything else went entirely wrong.

He was unable to pull into the driveway, seeing as there was a very noticeable truck there already. Finn's stomach lurched as he recognized Burt's car.

He was night shaking as he walked into the door, not knowing if Kurt had called ahead, or if the two people were just spending time with each other. It was Monday at four. Why wasn't Burt at work?

Finn didn't have time to wonder. As he walked into the house, trying to regain his composure, he heard Burt's voice from the kitchen, he sounded like he was having a one sided conversation.

"You okay? Yeah, uh, okay then. Hey, are you doing anything right now? Can you come over to the Hudson's for a while? Carol and I have an announcement to make. No, it's pretty important. Carol wants you guys here to hear it in person. Alright, alright. Have you seen Finn? Oh, wait, never mind."

It didn't take too long to imagine who the conversation was with. Finn tried not to faint.

Burt hung up and turned to Finn.

"Uh yeah. You're mom and I have something to tell you guys, Kurt'll be here in about fifteen minutes. Okay?"

Finn nodded blankly, turning to go upstairs before his mom met him half way, grinning.

"Where have you been? I was worried. "

"Uh, sorry,"

"No, no, just stay in touch, okay? "

She looked too excited to breathe. This looked dark for Finn, who had lived enough embarrassment and shame for one day. What she was planning on telling them he could only fathom, but no option made him feel too happy at the moment. If there was some kind of forgetting pill offered to him at the moment, he would have taken it four times over.

Of course, there wasn't, and the only thing Finn could do for twenty minutes was replay what had happened over and over again in his head. Soon, he couldn't tell truth from lies from events he wasn't even sure happened. If he thought about it too long, he could have sworn he felt Kurt's lips on his again, and it made him jump, just how wrong it didn't feel.

_Am I just homophobic? _He asked himself, turning over on his tiny bed. No, that couldn't be it. He had nothing against anybody, gay or straight. Something in the way his stomach was knotted told him that wasn't the reason. There was something more to it. What it was though, he couldn't put his finger on.

There was something in there, deeper than just his own feelings that kept him from just being able to say 'Hey, I'm Finn Hudson and I like Kurt Hummel.'

He'd not be able to probe farther, though, as there was a call for him downstairs. Seated around the living room was his mother and Burt on the loveseat, and Kurt on the couch, looking as prim and proper as ever. He would not, however, raise his eyes to meet Finn's.

If the parents noticed, though, they gave no indication. They were grinning statues, Burt with one arm over Carol's shoulder, Carol's hand lingering on Burt's knee.

"Sit down, Finn." His mother said softly. He did so.

Burt began talking. Finn was more aware of the fact that Kurt was watching him out of the corner of his eyes than the fact that Burt was launching into a long 'We've been seeing each other for a while, we really like each other, next step,' business. Finn shifted, turning away from Kurt. He didn't mean it coldly, he was just that much more aware of the fact that there was more than just plain friendship between them. It was like static, humming under his fingers. Tangible. Real.

He wanted to run.

"So, Carol and I have decided-"

"We're moving in together!" Carol squeaked, looking like she was about to pop from the anticipation.

Color faded from Finn's view. Beside him, Kurt covered his mouth and let out a gasp, out of happiness or horror he couldn't tell, but could assume. It took him a moment to realize how he was being stared at from all side, his reaction analyzed.

Finn took the high road.

"That's great."

Kurt nodded beside him. "Great."

"Great!" Carol parroted, her enthusiasm so much higher than the rest of the room. It was nice though, Finn had to admit, seeing his mother so happy. She had always melded so well into the working widow form; Finn had never really imagined her being unhappy. But seeing her with someone –even Burt- who made her grin like that, he couldn't be not happy for her.

"I'm really happy for you guys." Finn said, earning a slight nod from Burt. Kurt still looked stunned.

"Now, about housing. I was at Burt's earlier today, Finn, have you been there yet?"

Finn lied. "No."

"It's absolutely gorgeous. Now, there's an extra room you boys can fight over later, but it's not ready for people yet. It needs a lot of work, so we figured you two could share Kurt's basement! It's huge, Finn, with tons of room for both of you. You'll love it."

Love was not the word Finn would have chosen.

"Unless you have a problem with that, Kurt," Burt put in, nodding at his son. Finn, not knowing what would come of this, gave Kurt a long stare.

"That sounds fine. He'll need a bed though."

"He has a perfectly good one upstairs." His mother chirped, smiling at both boys. Both boys gave halfhearted smiles back.

"Now, I don't want this all to happen overnight, it will be a transition, but I think you two can look forward to spending a lot of time together in the future."

Twin grins that hid screaming faces.

"Well, that's that then. We'll keep you boys updated."

Finn got to his feet, spent. Was it only minutes ago that he sort-of-professed his love for Kurt? And now they were moving in together?

What?

"Well, I have homework to do." He said, making his way over to the stairs.

"And I have some things to do with Tina and Artie." Kurt said, making a run for the door. Before he reached it, though, he nudged Finn.

"We need to talk. Later."

And then proceeded to waltz out the door.

Finn shook his head. Talking was the last thing on his mind.

* * *

Huffah! Miss me? .3.

Okay, so, I feel like I should just get this out of the way; I know I turned Kurt into a marshmallow in this chapter. But Imo, there are two sides of Kurt, the cocky- confident School Kurt that we see when things go good, And then the torn up weak-ass little boy we see when everything falls apart. Lately we've been seeing a lot of secondary Kurt, but tough and cocky Kurt will be back with a vengeance in Part Six. Muahaha.

Meanwhile, honestly you guys, I'm thinking of just taking all the reviews and putting them on my wall. They make me glow with happiness. Really. :D

What you can look forward to in part six? Uh...Musical numbers, A cocky planning Kurt, creepy nightmares, and confrontation, along with so much moreee!

And I am verrry comment less. It's frightening. .p.

Much love! (Oh, I changed the Ole' pen name to Rhapshody (Mis-spelling intended) just in case anyone was confused. xD)


	6. Part Six, Sleepover

MUAH-AH-FREAKING HA.

I am back with a chapter I feel satisfied with. Punchkickvictory!

So. How's it going? It's been a whole like, day since the last uppy-date, but it feels like years. I really think writing this is therapeutic for me. Kurt and Finn only have to worry about their craaazy love, not graduation or geometry gradesss. .p. Unfortunately though, or fortunately for you action-favorables, I think it's safe to say that this story is -whisper whisper- More than half way done! .O.! This is the first time i've tackled a project so quickly, and I have no clue what I'm going to do once it's over. Probably go over it and fix all those damn grammar errors I can't motivate myself top go back and fix. Bad, Rhapshody, Bad.

ANYWAY. Enjoy this, It makes me quite happy. .3.

* * *

Kurt was right, they did need to talk. But if Monday's emotional meltdown had been anything to go by, Finn was sure he was not ready to have that conversation. In fact, with the knowledge that Finn had some sort of feelings for Kurt out in the open air, Finn was pretty much done having conversations all together. It wasn't like he could just go and randomly chat it up with Schuester, only to have words proclaiming protective love spilling uncontrollably out of his mouth, and being able to do nothing to stop it. But if he said something and it got twisted, he just didn't trust himself.

Fear of the truth now ruled his life.

It was stupid, he knew, to get as paranoid as he was getting. But the weird thing was, that broken dam feeling was exactly how he'd felt when he'd been speaking with Kurt. There had been nothing in the world to stop those words made of unicorns and rainbows spewing from his brain. He was fairly sure it wasn't going to happen again, but he wasn't about to take his chances.

Of course, usually when this happened, when some girl went all googly eyed over him and he didn't know how to react, he'd just sort of avoid her. Usually it was a girl from school, and he could easily enough find ways to get around her probing questions and little gifts. That was the road he'd planned on taking with Kurt.

Unfortunately, though, Kurt was everywhere.

And ironically, none of it was Kurt's fault.

At school, things were pretty easy, especially on Tuesday and Wednesday when Kurt avoided him like he was some sort of trash bag full of Gap t-shirts. Still, some meetings were inevitable, like in class when they were grouped together for a Spanish project (To have _conversations._ Was it Schu who was trying to kill them?) Or just around school, where the hallways were only potential bumping-into grounds. Of course, around those times, they would just avoid eye contact and talk so quietly they often ended up having one-sided conversations. Glee was made stressful by their awkwardness, near physical when they were put in such a space together. The Fireflies project was soon scrapped, instead using one of Rachel's suggestions for a number 'sure to delight every musically in tune judge who looks at them'.

Or, in other words, show tunes.

But at least school offered some sort of opportunity for separation. Usually, Finn could look forward to going home, relaxing, forgetting, or at least distracting himself. But of course, with the new family bonding as such, there was no relief.

Tuesday, Finn's mom had the Hummel's over for dinner, which, however charming, was about as strained as it could get, seeing as neither boy wanted to be within teen feet of each other, let alone speak to ask for more butter. Afterward, Finn could see that Kurt still wanted to talk, but Finn couldn't. He would fight that conversation to the death. So instead he stuck it out with the parents, never moving out of earshot.

Wednesday, Finn was invited over for an 'Offical Tour' of the Hummel household. Now that Finn was on Kurt's territory, he spent every moment while inside the house glued to his mother's shoulder. Kurt made repetitive attempts to separate the two, but Finn shook him off. He knew he was being cold, but didn't care.

Thursday was another day at the Hudson's, planning about what would happen to their own little bungalow and what would be going in the move. To Finn, it was about as interesting as watching grass. Dead grass. Grass that wouldn't even grow because it was spattered in bacon grease. Still, feeling Kurt's ever intensifying gaze on him, Finn stuck to his guns. He could just see the situation in his head, being separated, talking to Kurt, sobbing away like a toddler and one of them ending up hurt. It wasn't just his own pride Finn was protecting, he was still very much helping Kurt. As far as he was concerned, anyway.

Friday, Finn was determined to be alone for more than an hour. Whether it was faking leprosy or having a fit, he would damn-well be spending his time alone. He made it through the school day fairly well, spending most of his time with Puck or other jocks who Kurt pointedly avoided. He made sure that they would leave Kurt alone, and therefore was Kurtless himself. It wasn't until the end of the day that he smelled that distinctive cologne that came with Kurt on a good day.

Kurt had gotten back on his feet on Thursday. Apparently fed up with the awkward silences and the fidgeting, he'd been doing everything in his power just to talk to his crush. Finn figured that in the middle of the school nothing would happen, but if he made himself look open to such an event happening, he had no clue how that would transcend at home. Still, Kurt caught him off guard and he was trapped. Finn turned to him, trying to be cold. Kurt's eyes were bright and cheerful. Almost too cheerful. What was the word? Conniving?

"Finn." Kurt said, holding his books to his chest, Cheshire grin unwavering.

Finn nodded, throat dry.

"I'm sorry. I really am." Kurt reached out, stroking his fingers along Finn's arm. Shivers rode along with the touch and made Finn's spine quiver. But as soon as it happened, it was over, and Kurt was walking confidently over to where Mercedes was waiting patiently. When she saw him, her eyebrow arched and she turned and walked away, keeping pace with a nigh-giddy Kurt. Finn bit his lower lip, arm still tingling.

_Sorry? _ He repeated in his mind, grabbing his things and shoving them in his backpack. _Sorry for what?_

Unfortunately, the answer was not for him to know. He tried to catch up to Kurt, but by the time he hit the parking lot, Kurt's car was gone and there was no sign of Mercedes. As he crawled into his own car, Finn felt his mind racing. What did Kurt have to be sorry for? That kiss? That would make sense, but Kurt hardly looked apologetic as he spoke. Finn dialed Kurt's number in the car, but no answer. By the time he pulled into his driveway, his mind was racing.

"Hey, hon." Finn's mother said as he entered the house, feeling frazzled.

"Hi." He said, moving into the kitchen. Maybe it had just been about the kiss. Maybe Kurt was trying to tie up some loose ends, make things better between them. That would be nice. Then they could just put the whole love-y dove-y stuff behind them. Finn smiled as he took a sip of milk from the bottle.

"So what time is Kurt picking you up?"

Finn swallowed hard.

"What?"

"For the sleepover. Kurt said that you'd rather just ride with him for an easier trip."

Finn sputtered, hand slamming down on the banister.

"Wha-?"

"I have to say, when Kurt said you'd actually agreed to going, I was surprised. When was the last time you did anything like this? But it's so great that you're opening up to him like this. With you two…" her voice drained out in the background as Finn grabbed the house phone and took to the stairs, slamming his door behind him. He dialed Kurt's number furiously, face feeling hot with embarrassment.

"Hello?" Kurt's voice was cheerful, unaware.

"Dude. What the hell?"

"Ah, Finn. Are you packing?"

"Dude I am _not _going over to your house and I am _not _staying the night."

"All right then."

Finn, caught off guard by Kurt's oh- so polite voice, stuttered for a moment.

"But," Kurt continued, his voice sharp, "If that's how you're going to be, then you might as well start talking. You can't avoid this forever, Finn. So, sing to me everything you feel."

Finn vaguely remembered Kurt saying something like that before, though he was too far gone to pinpoint it.

"I am not singing to you!"

"Why? You could do it to a sonogram. You can't do it to the man you love?"

"Ffff…" Finn sputtered, face heating up. He checked his door, not knowing where his mother was. He covered the receiver. "What are you doing?" he hissed.

"It's simple." Kurt said. "You can either talk everything over with me right now, on the phone at your house with your mother there, or I can drive over at six sharp and take you home where we'll be alone and we can talk everything out like responsible adults. Your choice."

Finn sunk his teeth into his lower lip. There was no winning, was there? He wanted to tell Kurt he hated it, how whenever Kurt made up one of his little plans, it made him want to usher out a smack. But in fact, Finn often found it funny just how much Kurt loved to tempt fate, how things that often sounded perfect to him turned around and ended up in such a different way than expected. Finn laughed hoarsely.

"Six?" he asked.

"Six." Kurt repeated, and Finn could almost see him grinning on the other end of the line.

"I'll be there."

Kurt hung up without another word, and Finn called down to his mother that he'd be leaving soon. He had three hours, though, to plot. How was he going to get himself out of the gigantic hole he'd dug? He didn't want to lie, he hated doing it. All he wanted was for everything to be good again. As he flicked on his iPod, the first few lines made his eyes open. He grinned, getting up and maneuvering around the room.

Soon, it was like six o'clock couldn't come fast enough. And when it did, Finn was on such a high he couldn't imagine his plan going any other way than planned. As the horn outside beeped, Finn got up, slinging his clothes bag over his shoulder, iPod speakers under his arm. When Kurt saw him, he offered up an eyebrow raise. Finn got in the passenger seat, but soon made it clear that he wasn't yet going to speak. Kurt said nothing, only drove on until they reached his home. It wasn't until they reached the basement did Finn speak. Ignoring the nagging memories of the last thing that had happened there, he pointed at the couch and told Kurt to sit. The smaller boy did, looking nervous and excited. Finn plugged his iPod into the speakers and cranked up the volume. He could almost feel the show lights downing, the spotlight on his chest.

'_Love me cancerously…  
Like a salt-sore soaked in the sea.'_

The opening bars made Kurt sit up straighter. A pang of nervousness hit Finn hard. He pushed past it.

_'High-maintenance' means  
You're a gluttonous queen  
Narcissistic and mean.'_

Ouch. The first few words stung. He moved on.

'_Kill me romantically  
Fill my soul with vomit  
Then ask me for a piece of gum.  
Bitter and dumb  
You're my sugarplum!'_

At this point Finn could see the words were making impact, Kurt's face looking hurt. Finn shook his head. _Sorry, but there was no other way to let you know._

"_You're awful, I love you!"_

Kurt jumped a little on the last line as Finn sang it out, then smiled, though nervously. The point had not yet hit home. Finn hammered on, singing lines that alternated between cruel and affectionate. About halfway through the song, Kurt began to smile. Finally, the words faded out and Finn was left with only the fanfare.

"_Wha' 'bout that sign on my head  
That says, oh...  
Love me dead!"_

When he was done, he panted softly, suddenly feeling very stupid. If that had failed, Finn had no backup plan. He paused a second before he heard Kurt's oh-so polite clapping.

"Very nice." Kurt said, getting to his feet. Finn turned around and took his iPod back, terrified of what would happen next. "You know, they say honesty is the best policy. I agree."

Finn moved, not letting himself get too close. For a second the two boys circled each other, wary, predatory. The weird thing, though, was that neither were going for the kill.

"Me too." Finn decided. He moved over to the small egg-shaped chair that hung like a hammock. It groaned under his weight, but supported him. Kurt smiled.

"You do know what you just said to me?" He asked, though it was more like a statement.

"Yeah." Finn said, really getting over the truth himself. The song hadn't been perfect for the situation, but it fit by Finn's criteria just enough.

"So that wasn't too hard, was it?"

"Well." Finn said, putting up a hand. Already he could feel things getting out of control. His heart pounded.

"I…like you. I like you a lot. Not in like, the…the way you're thinking, but more than…more than most people would like."

Kurt grinned. He almost looked relived to hear him say the words.

"That's all I've ever wanted to hear." He said softly, moving closer. Finn scrambled, his legs slipping on the tile. He didn't know why Kurt getting so close terrified him like that, but it did. The boy stopped short. He laughed softly.

"I'm not going to rape you, Finn." Finn blinked. It took him a second to find the humor. "Just because I've liked you for a while doesn't mean that, just because we might have feelings, I'm not going to make you my ultra-fabulous flaming gay beau. But if you're serious, and you really could have those feelings, you shouldn't hide from them. Or from me."

Finn relaxed a fraction. What Kurt was saying made sense. The chair swung softly.

"I…I said before…I don't know how to…feel that way. For a guy."

That wasn't completely true. Sometimes, when he was alone, he would think about Kurt. It was way more innocent than the way he'd thought of Quinn or Santana, but sometimes he'd be daydreaming and feel Kurt's hand, so small and soft, in his own. Or when Kurt sat near him in Glee practice or lunch, he'd imagine just how easy it'd be to reach over, pull Kurt close to him and feel him, no space between them, inseparable. Sometimes he'd feel Kurt's lips on his neck, soft butterfly kisses…his voice in his ear…

Things never went farther than that though, because he'd always scare himself so bad that he'd ricochet back to doing geometry or trying to turn Kurt into Brittany.

Kurt's fingers drummed against the opposing wrist, bringing Finn back.

"How did you feel with Quinn?"

The first thing that came to mind there was turned on. But Finn wasn't about to admit that, especially with the connection Kurt was trying to make.

"I felt relaxed. Happy. When she was there, things were better."

"And when you're with me?"

_Seventeen times that._

"Yeah, kinda the same. But, I mean, I don't know if I can get all…all lovey and stuff with you. I mean, it's not _you _you, just the fact that you're-"

"I'm gonna stop you there."

Finn was relived. He had no clue how many more time's he could made 'You' and 'Like, uh' into coherent sentences.

"I'm not saying you're in love, and I'm not saying you don't like me. I'm saying that you're like every other teen in the world, and have feelings that could lead to a good relationship. Would I be on the mark there?"

Finn, surprisingly easily, nodded.

"Then we should try. Just dip our toes in. See what becomes of it."

"But." Finn said. As he tried to make himself push more words out, he found very little to say.

"But I don't want it to be public." Those words came out in a rush, sounding crueler than they were meant.

"Like, that sounds sick, But I don't even know if I like you or what's going to happen, I have no idea. Just…I mean, I'll try it, yeah, but…"

"Oh, and something I should mention."

And that was how that sentence ended. Kurt stared at him. He didn't look hurt or angry, but he wasn't chipper either.

"I get that thing you were saying, the other day, when you said you just wanted to protect me. In fact, I think it was the most heartwarming thing I'd ever heard." His hand fluttered to his heart. Finn tried to hide his grin.

"But I don't want you to think I'm this weak little thing. I'm a strong person, Finn Hudson, and if you challenge that I will show you how strong I can be. That's not to say I wouldn't appreciate any help with the slushie facials, but I don't need you to protect me. It's just a perk."

Finn did not flinch at this information. He'd known how strong Kurt could be, even if he did look like something that just needed to be kept safe, and Finn knew he could respect that. The fact that Kurt was so willing to put all his cards on the table made Finn like him that much more.

Still. As soon as that thought crossed his mind, barriers went up. Why did it still spook him that bad when he thought that?

"Yeah. Of course, Kurt."

"…So secret almost-boyfriends?" He asked, the look on his face unreadable.

"…Sure."

Kurt nodded. He moved a bit, like he was unsure what to do next, then slowly walked out of the room and up the stairs. The door shut behind him.

It did little to muffle the whooping "YES!" that cascaded through the walls almost at a decibel too high to hear.

The rest of the night was placid, to say the least. It wasn't like last week, when everything had been so warm and innocent and happy. It was more just like…hanging out. They went upstairs and watched Tv, Kurt took a shower while Finn did homework, and by eleven thirty both boys placidly were setting up for bed. Kurt had a futon bed, and even though he asked politely if they'd liked to share it, Finn had chosen to sleep on a pile of couch cushions on the floor. Kurt had said nothing. Finn was lying there as Kurt got up, reaching into a drawer and pulling out a small white square.

"You need to see this."

Finn shifted, sitting up. Kurt sat on the edge of the bed, his feet by Finn's abdomen.

"Your mom gave it to me, she said it was too precious not to share. But she didn't want to weird anyone out. I never planned on showing you, but, now that we're…something, I want you to trust me."

The square fluttered down and Finn caught it. It was a picture, dark and blue hued, a little smudgey. And it was small. It took almost a few seconds to recognize anything. But after a second, the blurry white patches became people, became boys, became them. Finn studied it. Kurt resting peacefully on his shoulder, Finn completely relaxed on home turf. It was almost alien, seeing this sort of thing. But it made him smile all the same. He looked at Kurt.

"You're never going to show anyone this?"

"No." Kurt said, smiling.

"Then it's awesome."

He handed the photo back, watching as Kurt put it softly in a drawer. He then turned out the light, making his way onto his bed. Silence stretched against the walls for a moment, before Finn heard something softly, softly playing.

"Did you leave your music on?" he whispered, though why he couldn't fathom.

"Yeah." Kurt answered after a pause. "I sleep with my headphones in."

"Really?" Finn asked. "I sleep with my radio on."

Kurt let out a soft laugh. "Want to just turn your iPod on? I don't know much about your musical tastes."

Finn rolled over, seeing his speakers near him on the ground. "Sure," he grunted, taking the iPod off the end table above him and plugging it in, turning it to the playlist 'Sleep'. Softly, music began to flow through the room. Finn recognized the song. It was one of the one's Rachel had suggested he earn when they went out, and though it usually left a bad taste in his mouth, now the words seemed to have meaning.

_Every time I see your smile  
It makes my heart beat fast  
And though it's much too soon to tell  
I'm hoping this will last…_

Almost on instinct, he began to sing along.

'_I must've done something right__,  
To deserve you in my life,  
I must've done something right along the way…'_

There was a shifting, and a moment later Kurt's face was hanging off the bed, watching Finn. In the dark, his pale skin seemed to glow softly, his smile wide.

'_And even if the moon fell down tonight,__There'd be nothing to worry about at all,  
Because you make the whole world shine.  
As long as you're here everything will be alright…'_

The song was short, and soon shifted over to something else. But the tune lingered. Above Finn, Kurt turned away, his little show over.

Finn's stomach flipped as he got up, not even knowing what he was doing. His hand's trembled as he steadied himself on the edge of the bed. Then, out of sheer impulse, he leaned over and kissed Kurt softly on the cheek.

Then he lay down, letting the music play on, and fell asleep.

* * *

HAHA. Six chapters and ONE honesty to goodness cheek-kiss. ROMANCE. -Heart-

The songs mentioned are 'Love me Dead' by Ludo and 'If the Moon Fell Down Tonight' by Chase Coy. .3. And yes, you can expect more selections from my iPod as time goes on.

See you in chapter Seven!


	7. Part Seven, Secret Almost Boyfirends

Tasty tasty drama. .3.

Alright, I'll admit, I struggled with this chapter. There was a lot ai wanted to say, and if I did it all it would have tacked up at about a third of my last goal for nanowrimo. I tried to cut it down to size and still give it a dramatic impact, but I feel like I didn't do as well as I could. Hopefully I'll hit my stride with part eight. (Why is it I always struggle on Kurt's parts? Dammit.) So enjoy, I guess. ;n;

Ah well. If nothing else, I'll foce myself to go back and do it better. .p.

Much love- Rhapsody.

* * *

Kurt Hummel was on cloud nine. To say that the happy centers in his mind were collapsing into themselves and creating a gaping black hole of joy was just above the line of an understatement. AS he lay there, listening quietly as selections of Finn's iPod floated around the room, he had to reach over and give his arm a real pinch to see it this was all really happening. The sharpness f fingernails against skin proved that it was.

He almost still couldn't believe it.

He had been stunned the few days before, with the episode Finn had gone through. Of course, at that point he hadn't allowed himself to be happy, not knowing if Finn knew what he was saying and was telling the truth, or if he was just having a mental breakdown from all the stuff he'd been going through. It was the kind of twist Kurt lived for in television, but had only dreamed about in his mind. The idea that one day the boy he lived to see each day was just going on and on (an ON) About how much he wanted to protect him and love him…it was mind blowing.

_And it was real._

Kurt smiled, listening to Finn's breaths coming slow and steady in the rhythm of sleep. Part of him wanted to roll over and look, just to make sure once more, that this was actually happening. But he wasn't about to look like some kind of a creeper to a guy who openly admitted he didn't know how to love another guy. Creepy sleep-watching was not the first step. So instead, Kurt lay back, watching the ceiling and listening to Finn breathe until eventually he, too, slipped into the inky darkness of rest.

_Things started off well in the dream. Lips, touching, feelings that were too good to be actual. Kurt was aware of hands, up and down his spine, through his hair, caressing him, and him returning the favor. It felt incredibly good, and the only thing that was keeping it imperfect was the fact that his eyes were closed._

_Like hell, he thought, if this is going to happen, I'm not doing it blind He flicked his eyes open, expecting to see Finn in front of him, only to be startled by his own face. He jumped a little before pulling away and looking down at himself. He was not, in fact, fair haired light skinned little Kurt Hummel. He was Frankenteen himself, all six feet and lanky with short dark brown hair. Caught off guard, Dream Finn/Kurt stared at dream Kurt-Kurt in confusion. Dream Kurt was looking at him like some sort of googly eyed mess. Finn/Kurt knew he should have been embarrassed at being such a mess, but was instead just completely enraptured. Like he didn't want to be away from himself for more than a second. Which, while incredibly narcissistic, he also found very romantic. It was simple for Finn/Kurt to push off the weirdness of the situation and move in, trying to get back in the groove of making out with himself._

_That was when the door opened. Noah Puckerman stood at the other end, looking in with black, dead eyes. Dream Finn/Kurt moved closer to other Kurt, pulling him close, protecting him. That made the beast that was Puck snort, looking a mixture of amused and angry. He moved closer, and as he did Finn/Kurt held other Kurt closely._

"_I'll protect you." Finn/Kurt said to the other Kurt, who in return hooked onto Finn's ribcage like a child. Puck moved closer, but as he did the blackness of their surroundings faded away, and the familiar sounds of cheering fans and football commands rang out, and as he blinked the world turned into the football field, with not only Puck running at them, but the entire football team. And both Kurt Kurt and Finn Kurt were just standing there, unprotected, weak as they were charged. In the bleachers, insults and hate were roared, and Finn/Kurt felt his defenses buckle. Still, he moved in front of Dream Kurt all the same, shielding him. Just as the football team was about to trample them though, the world shifted again, and Finn/Kurt found themselves in their old living room, as Carol cried melodramatically and Burt shook his head, saying words of discouragement over and over again. That was when Finn/Kurt buckled, turning to other Kurt._

"_I want to help you." He hissed at himself, who now looked very…very wrong. He looked like some stereotypical flaming gay, like something the medial would make up to show just how ridiculous and stupid gays were. Kurt, even in the dream, was offended at how terrible he looked._

"_I want to help, but if the world hates me, I can't. I've lost everything for you. I need it back. I can't love you anymore."_

_And as Finn/Kurt watched dream Kurt crumble into a heap of depression, Finn/ Kurt stood, staring out at what had turned into a sea of people, all turning from hate at him instantly into cheers. _

"_I'm sorry." The words rang in his ears, "But they're just more important."_

Kurt Hummel, the real Kurt Hummel, jerked awake. He could feel his pulse in every inch of his body and as he blinked he felt the sting of almost- tears in his eyes. What the hell had just happened? That was a dream, he knew it was a dream, but the impact was still there, making Kurt shiver a bit as he thought about it.

Was that, he wondered as he looked at his alarm clock, how Finn felt? Like he wanted to help, but was afraid of everyone else? As Kurt got shakily to his feet and stepped around the sleeping form of Finn, looking like a little angel, he couldn't help but remark on how foolish that was. Like, in the beginning of the dream, he'd been really, really happy. Non only _that _kind of happy, but like, in love. Kurt didn't know exactly what "Love" felt like (He knew crushes. He knew crush love very well) but what he'd known in that first few seconds, that seemed to trump the fear and fury that came later.

Kurt climbed the stairs, knowing his dad would probably either be up or gone. The shop opened at 10:30 on Saturdays, and it was currently 10:03. The smell of fresh coffee met him in the kitchen.

_It was just a nightmare. _Kurt told himself, shaking off the last bits of fear and pouring the bitter liquid into a cup.

_Just a stupid dream._

Still. He had to ask himself. Was that really how Finn felt?

If it was, it was awful.

Fifteen minutes passed before Finn came upstairs, and by then Kurt had talked himself out of most of the insanity. He was just happy to be there, with Finn, who was in fact, his Secret-almost-boyfriend. Kurt chose to dwell on that rather than the stupid dream, and found it that much better as inn stepped into the kitchen, looking bedraggled and messy. Kurt ran a hand through his hair. God, he must've looked like a mess.

He knew it was silly, but in his mind Kurt envisioned the romantic comedy version of how he'd liked thins to happen. He'd been doing it for a while, not on purpose or anything, just daydreaming. And as Finn stepped into the kitchen, he imagined how next, Finn would smile and walk over, pulling Kurt close and kissing the top of his terribly messy head. He'd whisper something sweet, and then take a sip of Kurt's coffee before pouring himself a cup . Then they'd both sit down and talk about things, before going off and having a terrific day. It was cheesy, he knew, but it was also the way he wanted it.

Of course, that was nowhere near that terrible thing called reality.

In reality, Finn walked in the with grace of a baby deer and nodded awkwardly at Kurt before rubbing crud out of his eyes and collapsing at the table not far off.

"Did I wake you up?" Kurt asked, eyeing Finn curiously. Why was it he found those qualities so adorable? Whereas some might find that kind of morning routine less than charming, it made Kurt have to hide a little grin. Maybe it was just the fact that he was seeing Finn. In the morning. At his house. _Secret almost Boyfriends!_

"Nah," Finn said, wiping the sleep from his eyes. "I'm just a mess in the morning."

"Not too bad." Kurt replied, wondering just how affectionate secret-almost boyfriends could be. "Just…Coffee?" He purred.

"Sure." Finn said, watching out the window as bored looking squirrels dug through the snow for treasures on the lawn. Kurt poured him a cup, estimating the creamer and sugars, then sat adjacent to him. He smiled as Finn blinked back to reality and took a sip of the coffee, sputtering at the heat.

"Hm." Finn said, looking positively thoughtless. How long did it usually take his brain to warm up?

"So. Finals next week are gonna be a bitch."

Next week? Finals? RIGHT. Kurt swallowed a scalding mouthful (Rather than his alternative, the almost too comical Spit-take) realizing that on Monday through Friday, they'd be testing in classes, doing a pep rally for the school, and then would have two weeks for the winter holiday break. In which time, no doubt, the 'family' would pack up and head off, as Kurt and his father did every year, to spend a few days just outside the city at his grandparents. Which made Kurt stare intently at the cupboards in front of him because he realized, unless Carol was going to be a spoil sport and deny the Hummel's their grandparental love, he'd have Finn all to himself for at least, but not limited to, four days.

Kurt tried not to jump up and down like a an idiot and was only brought back down to earth as Finn spoke to him once more.

"You okay?" Finn asked, giving Kurt an 'are you a crazy person?' look. Kurt reeled himself in, realizing he couldn't exactly share his feelings. What would Finn think if he was told he was being taken t a house very far away where, most likely, they would be in a giant house with, at least half the time, only each other as company? Kurt had a feeling Finn wouldn't be _as _thrilled as he was.

The two stayed together until about noon, when Finn told Kurt he had plans to hang out with some other friends. And while he told Kurt he was welcome to come, Kurt could see just how much of 'Secret' was going to be put in the whole 'secret' boyfriend thing.

But that was okay. Kurt still had to remember that dream, and wonder if that was how Finn felt, or thought he would feel if their secret came out. Like hell Kurt would be hiding from any drama that faced them, but at the same time he wanted nothing to go wrong with his new best friend.

After the weekend, the week could have not crept by slower. Kurt spend nearly every moment bored, distracted, waiting. It didn't help, of course, that Finn pretty much denied Kurt's existence at school. If Kurt got close, Finn would bolt, like he was terrified that Kurt was going to attack him with like, kisses and chocolate. Secret, Kurt had to remind himself, secret _almost _boyfriends. And apparently that came with a hellofa lot of paranoia.

But it would be worth it. Within a week, the family would pack up, embark on the drive that would take them to the city, and then there would be no needs for secrets because, as long as they older people were gone, there would be no one to keep the secrets from.

Sure enough, as they boys got home Thursday, it was brought up by Burt that, if they wanted, Carol and Finn could go upstate and meet Burt's lovely mother and father. Then perhaps they could go and see Carol's family and don't forget both sets of other grandparents who were both so excited to meet the new boys in their lives and so on and such as. It all really sounded like garble to Kurt after Carol agreed to embark on the journey. Kurt tried not to float away.

And so began the winter of their most-content. They would spend Christmas at Kurt's grandparents and then hop from event to event with the other eight days of break, just stopping and planning a nice little new year's party at home. It all sounded meticulously wonderful to Kurt, who knew exactly how to be a social butterfly in these sort of situations. It was exhillerating.

Christmas came and went, and Kurt was the recipient of mostly money, something cherished for him, seeing as no one really dared to go out and buy him anything specific with his 'interesting' tastes. Finn got kind of snubbed, seeing as most relatives hadn't known about him or his mother until a few days before, but Kurt promised to go out and get him something with his own money. All in all, combined with the money his father had gotten him and the fact that they were a very short drive away from a decently fashionable city…it all added up for Kurt.

Unfortunately, Kurt couldn't win everything, and his Romantic head-over-heels vision of the next two weeks stayed just that. That wasn't to say that the boys didn't bond. No, they had plenty of moments where Kurt wanted to never move, never let time pass on. Within the first few days, the awkwardness around being together faded, and Finn could deal with being with Kurt all the time. The boys could talk, laugh, and soon began to bond with each other on deeper and deeper levels. It stopped being about music and favorite colors and all those little part-time relationship things, and really started to deepen. They got into discussions about their parents, about the pressures in their lives, about how terrified they really were of the world around them. Soon, they were inseparable. But at the same time there was always a distance. Kurt wanted nothing more than to have Finn, fully and really, all to himself. But if that included being out in public, around the parents, or even talking about being near people, Finn clamped shut like a startled clam. Kurt tried to think back to that dream he had, where it was Finn against the world, but still, he couldn't relate.

Kurt knew there was a lot Finn had to fight. Whereas Kurt had known himself his whole life, Finn now had this new part of himself to face. And for the boy who wanted to make everyone happy, this was a challenge he couldn't win. Finn faced this by simply never acknowledging Kurt as any more than a person near him when they were in the public eye. When they went shopping Finn kept a distance and never met anyone's eyes. At parties he was always on the other side of the room. Even when it was just the parents, Finn kept his distance, never even meeting Kurt's eyes. Kurt tried to deal with it as well as possible, trying to sympathize with Finn's inner war, and for the most part did well. But there were times when he'd be happy, enjoying himself and laughing, and he'd feel for Finn around him, eager to share his joy. And that's when he would feel it. Like rejection, a little stab that told him that, no matter how much they liked each other, it wasn't enough to make Kurt matter. And that was when Kurt was at his worst.

When looking back on that break, Kurt would often have to do it with a grain of salt. Did he have a fantastic boyfriend that claimed to love him like no other? He did. But damn it if anyone else would ever know. Suffice it to say, as both boys awoke on the third of January and began to ready themselves for their first day of school, tensions were high.

Kurt awoke Finn with a kiss on his nose.

Finn blinked awake and smiled in that dopey way that made Kurt's heart melt. Things had been rather boring lately, with the post-holiday hurra fading and school looming. They were living together full time now, which made things just that much better or worse, depending on how it was chosen to be looked at. Finn had been particularly distant, as though he was trying to put up a few (More) barriers before school started.

Already, Kurt knew there was going to be no hand holding or sweet talking. If anyone saw the boys, they'd be positively oblivious to their affections. The physical side of things would be easy for Kurt, seeing as the boy's hadn't gotten any farther than hand holding and closed mouth kisses. But the thought of spending his time thoroughly ignored by Finn all day nearly tore Kurt to bits. And nowadays, when he really had to face how little Finn would do with him in public, Kurt would just refer back to the dream, trying to remember the horror, the embarrassment, the shame. It was the only way Kurt knew to react, other than a hissy fit.

Kurt strutted over to his closet and began to put together his outfit. He'd pack three, not knowing how many Puck would ruin in the time of one day, and would then make one for Finn. As the taller boy began to wake up, Kurt leafed through the new outfits that he'd bought Finn for gifts. They were all very Kurt-esque, but to Kurt that made it all the better. As he picked out a nice shirt, new pants, a jacket and some accessories, Finn ambled up behind him. Kurt handed him the outfit. Finn blinked.

"I can't wear this."

The remark was so blunt, Kurt could almost feel the words smarting into his skull.

"Why not?"

"It's so…fancy. Like, you'd wear this to an event dinner."

"The first day back to school is an event." Kurt chirped, picking out the ensemble for backup outfit two.

"Kurt. I can't wear this to school. Everybody will see it and…"

"And what?"

"They'll…They'll think something's up. Don't you think it would be kind of obvious?"

Publicly ignoring and denying Kurt's existence was one thing. But bashing his fashion sense? That was a whole new realm. Kurt turned darkly away, walking over to the mirror. He fixed his hair and said nothing. Finn backtracked.

"It's not that I don't like the clothes, I just think they're a bit much. I mean, you wear the whole….fancy clothes thing great. I don't think I could pull it off." He was trying to be sweet. Kurt didn't care.

"Whatever, wear a potato sack for all I care. It won't matter. We won't be seen together, will we?"

Finn looked at him sideways.

"What?"

"It's not like you'll even look at me the moment we leave this basement. As soon as we're in the view of the public, I might as well be invisible."

"Kurt, we talked about this, I'm not ready to-"

"To WHAT." Kurt barked, surprising himself with the anger. "To tell the world you're in love? To kiss me, really, actually Kiss me? What if I were Quinn? Or Santana? I'd be your arm candy all day. But no, I'm Kurt, I'm the gay soprano, I'm a bruise to your image. It's like Mercedes said when I told her I liked you. She said I just liked to idea of you. You know, the great looking football jock with the heart of gold. But no, I told her she was wrong. I liked you because you were Finn Hudson, boy , happy, sweet. But it's the opposite with you, isn't it? You love me, I know you do, but you _hate _the idea of me. Of having a boyfriend. Of being looked at a little differently because you think my eyes are gorgeous nd I'm a good kisser! You said you weren't ready to be with me? Well then, I guess I'm not ready to be with you. Someone's who's so afraid of the big bad world isn't good enough for me. I'll see you at school.

Or no.

Guess I won't."

And with that, Kurt left a very stunned Finn in the middle of his basement.


	8. Part Eight, Parting Words

Hello chums! It was nice to see how much you all like confident Kurt and Douchey Finn because, well, they're back. xD Part eight was particularly fun to write, even if I was doing it while watching an Owl City concert (You try being mad with that voice in your ear. Kurt should sing some Owl City, actually. Hot Air Balloon, maybe. A nice slow cover...Bah, I do this too much. .p.) Anyway, I think it's fair to say that the end is in sight. I can't WAIT to switch the status of this story to complete. (Part Nine won't be the end, but we're getting there. Gaspeh.) How awesome will that be? :D Next, I think I'll work on a Doctor Who Crossover, something long and with more than two main characters. xD And Alienssss oooo.

As always, your reviews make my day and It's s great to hear from you all. your response to this will very well determine a lot of the mood in part nine. 333 Oh, and if you guys want to throw any angry songs at me, feel free. That'll be in part ten, most likely. 3 (Another thing Owl City is not good for when writing drama. Angy love songs. (Golf and alcohol don't mixx...and that's why I don't drink and drive~~ Oh the drama...) OH! and I used wordplay I've always wanted to use in this chappy. Let's see if you can spot it. ,3,

Okay, I'm gonna stop now and let you guys get to the good stuff. Love and bubs, Rhapshody.

(And It's Mothers Day (When I posted this anyway)so people, tell yo mamma you love 'em! And write sad Kurtfics that end in romance! I know I will...ehehehe~)

Love!

* * *

Finn sat, staring blankly at the stairs Kurt had climbed seconds ago. His mind was running with their parting words, well Kurt's parting words, and he was trying to make sense of what the hell had just happened. His mouth opened as he tried to think of anything to say, but he could just see the front lawn outside, and how Kurt's boots stomped coldly, fading away and returning with a fierce roar of a car engine. Obviously, Kurt was in no mood to hear Finn's side of the story. Finn blinked. It was just a little after seven and school didn't start until eight. That left a lot of time for thinking.

Finn's mouth tasted like sleep. It was bitter and sickly, reflecting the feeling in the pit of his stomach as he thought about the last four and a half minutes. Finn wasn't even fully awake. Had Kurt just broken up with him? Had Finn just referred to whatever the two guys had as 'going out'? This was too much for being awake only five minutes.

He moved robotically, picking out clothes from his half of the closet (It was like looking at Salvation army next to a fashion show. Even Finn had to shake his head a little.) On the bed was Kurt's outfit, something that Finn knew he would look absolutely ridiculous. He wouldn't look bad…but Finn liked average-ness. Mediocrity was his comfort zone. Putting on something he'd wear to the Oscars would make him look…outstanding. As in standing out.

He felt like he was moving in slow motion as he climbed the steps and moved out the door. He wasn't used to being yelled at, other than in football, and never when he wasn't fully conscious. He had no idea what would happen as he climbed into his freezing car and revved the engine, but he knew he had to talk with Kurt. It would have to wait until after school, but he figured he could do as the boys had planned, keeping near him, keeping him out of Puck and the rest of the Jocks' way, maybe Kurt would be willing to speak with him at the end of the day. He had no other plans to go by other than that, and only could hope Kurt didn't still feel like tearing him a new one at school.

If there was a scene made…

He didn't want to think about it.

Pulling into William McKinley, Finn could only think about how different things were supposed to be. He and Kurt had talked it out. Finn, with his surprising protective feelings for Kurt, would stay near, ready to make as much distraction as needed for Kurt to get away. They didn't know how long it would last, but with Finn's ever present need to make up for…that day…Finn would have felt accomplished all the same.

But it was 7:46 when he pulled into the parking lot. Either Kurt had escaped, or had moved onto his second outfit of the day. Finn shook his head. What Kurt had said earlier was fading fast, and still Finn was processing it. What did Kurt mean when he said those things? That Finn didn't like the idea of him, that Kurt wasn't ready…it was a loud angry blur. But Finn was sure as soon as he sat Kurt down and reminded him of his pride, how he just wasn't ready to be…so public, that Kurt would bounce back. Then Finn would give him a nice little kiss and they'd go back to being happy. It was the perfect plan.

Still, he couldn't help but cringe as he saw a very familiar blue (correction; Midnight Indigo) Low-hip length coat tossed over the edge of the dumpster. When Finn got there he peeked in, but the wearer of the coat was gone. Finn picked it up. He was planning on giving it back to Kurt to discourage a public attack, but was intercepted at the doors as Artie wheeled up with Tina behind him. Artie grabbed the coat and Tina gave him a cold glare, then both turned to the building. Finn's blood turned cold. Kurt had told them? And he was making Finn into a bad guy? That drama queen!

He marched through the familiar halls, not stopping to exchange niceties with others around him. Where was Kurt? They needed to talk. When Finn finally found him in the nurse's office Kurt was complaining of a stomach ache. Finn tried to start a conversation, Kurt gagged melodramatically and the nurse shooed him out. Outside the door, Mercedes was waiting like a predator, and gave Finn an angry stare as he made his way to first period. Finn felt like he was turning to ice. First Kurt's hissy fit, then he was running around telling the world? Why was he pushing Finn's buttons like that?

Still, the way Puck only greeted him with the usual nod and sigh look that he'd been using since fourth grade meant that the worst of the people didn't know. And if it was just Artie, Tina, and Mercedes, the he might be able to contain the secret before it spread.

Finn shuddered as he imagined what would happen if people knew. How Puck would treat him like some sort of alien creature, how, no doubt, his mother would be crushed at the feelings Finn couldn't fight. How the world was just so against what he was… and how they would turn on him in a snap. Golden Boy Finn had already had one run in with trouble with the Quinn situation, and he'd done his best to do everything right for the best outcome. That was all he was doing now. Trying to make everyone happy.

Kurt wasn't in first hour, and in third he excused himself to the bathroom and never came back. Finn didn't see him in-between classes, and was beginning to wonder if he'd ever see him again when Rachel found him (Three times actually,) Making sure he'd bee in Glee after school. She didn't seem to know anything either.

Which was good.

Finn could corner Kurt after practice and make sure he would be going home where Finn could tell him to retract the rumors. Finn still cared very much about Kurt and just wanted both of them to be happy. Finn just didn't think that could happen with this secret rolling around like a sickness.

When Glee came around, Finn approached Kurt cautiously. He was dressed in his second outfit, meaning the dumpster dip was the worst things had gotten. That was good. Still, as he began to speak, Kurt cut him off. Beside him, Mercedes placed a hand protectively on Kurt's knee.

"Let me guess," Kurt hissed, staring at his fingernails. "You want to talk. At home."

Kurt made no attempt to silence himself. Finn flinched, lowering his voice.

"Yeah." He said, looking at his shoes.

"Fine, I'll be there. But you better have some responses ready."

Finn, expecting another blowout, sighed in relief. He tried to look cheerful and not the mixture of terror and anger that was bubbling up inside him, and calmly moved to sit by Rachel and Santana, who were having a light conversation about something Jesse had said earlier. Finn tried to engage, he was no fan of Jesse and wouldn't pretend to be, but it got his mind off Kurt, and that was good enough for him. As Schuester walked in, welcoming them back cheerfully and holding up sheet music, Finn could feel things moving back to normal. So what if he and Kurt had some sort of a scuffle? It was unfortunate, but it was nothing that couldn't be fixed. And as long as Kurt was finished telling the rest of the world about their affair, Finn didn't see why such a big deal had to be made.

Schuester gave the club some assignment that had to do with love/hate songs, then they ran through an exercise with the song "Everything's Magic" by Angels and Airwaves. It was a mushy sort of love song, and every once in a while Finn would look over to see Kurt eyeing him, though not in the way he'd come accustomed to. Not that affectionate 'This song makes me smile because it makes me think of you' sort of way. No, when Finn met Kurt's eyes, it was more like "You douche."

Which did its fair amount to sting. But he made it through practice alive, and managed to avoid incident outside the building and in the car, where he was more preoccupied with watching Quinn and Puck coddle outside the building than how Kurt spoke rapidly to Mercedes outside his own car. Finn felt a pang of jealousy as Quinn gave Puck a hug and a kiss on the cheek. If only he could have that with Kurt. (A giddy shiver went up his spine. It still spooked him, how he was just able to think that now. That counted for something, didn't it? Finn was sure he wasn't all bad.)

Finn made it home just in time to see Kurt walking in the house, all traces of anger and rage kept neatly under a tightly buttoned jacket. Finn smiled. Had Kurt called him fake? Well Kurt was just as bad an offender. Turning off the engine and popping his headphones in, Finn was sure everything was going to be fine.

Kurt was waiting for him in the basement.

There was something Finn had learned in Glee, something about owning the stage. It was usually physically impossible to fit ones self across the whole stage to make your presence reach, stretch, and make use of all the space so nothing was boring or unattended to. Usually for Finn, this meant a lot of jumping, singing, moving and dancing so that he made use of every inch give to him. But as Finn walked down the stairs to the basement, seeing Kurt poised like a lion in his egg-shaped chair, he got a whole new lesson in how to own a space. As Kurt blinked and uncrossed his legs like some kind of demon, Finn could of swore shadows filled the room. Probably his imagination, but the darkness in Kurt's gaze was, to say the least, startling.

"Hello, Finn." Kurt said curtly.

"H-hi, Kurt." Finn said, taken aback. He hadn't expected so much anger. A shiver went down his spine.

Kurt got up, and as he did some of the power he held faded. As Kurt met Finn's eyes, Finn could see more than rage. There was a sadness there, and it almost made Finn jump.

"So what do you have to say?" Kurt asked, moving over to Finn and stopping a few feet short. Finn had to fight the urge to back away, he had a feeling that wasn't what Kurt wanted. His question took him as odd though. That was something a parent would say to a child. And not only that, but it was that kind of question where no answer was right.

"Kurt, I don't, I don't know what you mean."

The anger came again as Kurt's lips twitched into a full frown. That was the kind of Kurt Finn was terrifyingly in love with at school. This was Kurt when nothing could take him down. Adrenaline Kurt, Super Kurt. It was scary being on the wrong side of it though. Finn swallowed as Kurt took another step forward.

" I _mean,_" He growled, "The way you treat me like I'm some plaything that you only want when it's convenient to you."

Finn blinked. "What do you mean? I don't treat you like that."

Kurt started to reply. "You really think that?"

"Yeah? I mean, we're still getting used to liking each other, right?"

"Really. So the fact that we just spent the past two weeks together doing nothing but talking meant nothing to you?"

"No." Finn said, taking a step forward. "That was awesome and I had a ton of fun. And I do like you, a lot more than I thought I did. But that doesn't mean…"

"That you're ready to look at me like anything more than a dishrag?"

"I don't look at you like a dishrag."

"Not when we're alone. But God forbid there's another person in the room…"

"I can't let people know yet! I'm not ready…Oh, and-"

"Not ready for what, Finn? To let the world know you like me? To tell your mom you're gay? Oh, so scary! Someone might actually dislike you, call the police!"

Finn frowned. "Yeah, I'm not ready to let people know about me yet! I still don't know about me! And if my mom, or if Puck, or if anyone else knew-"

"You'd be mildly embarrassed for a small amount of time! Woah." Kurt made a pseudo- scared face.

"It wouldn't be mild, Kurt, you of all people know how people look at…at…"

"Gays." Kurt filled in, is voice sharp. "So? You're just one of those homophobic gays now? Afraid of who you are? Afraid of letting yourself be you?"

"It's not me I'm afraid of!"

"Then who?"

"Everyone else!" Finn, almost on instinct, kicked out a leg and topped a pristine white chair. Kurt watched it coldly. "If I walked around like I wanted to, with you on my side all…open and stuff, then all the stuff I've done to fit in and be happy would be ruined."

"You dramatic little…" Kurt ruggedly pushed his hair out of his eyes. "No one would care, Finn. I know for a fact that when people find out-"

"That's right! You Told Mercedes! And Tina and Artie! Who else did you tell?"

"No one!" Kurt barked, his rant slowly forgotten. "Mercedes guessed when she saw me that something was up. As far as Artie and Tina know, we're fighting like siblings. If you'd pull your head out of your ass for two seconds, you'd see that no one cares that much about who you are. You're just so paranoid, wanting to make everyone happy,"

"I am not!" Finn said, feeling his muscles clench. If this was anyone else, Finn would have decked them by now. But this was Kurt, the one Finn loved, the one Finn wanted to protect. Violence would be against the point here.

A small silence stretched across the room as a smile forced across Kurt's lips.

"You thought you got Quinn pregnant by coming in a hot-tub. You're either very eager to please, or even more stupid than I thought."

Stupid, ignorant, Finn felt the rage up to his ears. For a moment he forgot why he cared about Kurt at all.

"I wanted to help you. I wanted to make things better. It was you who brought these things so far."

"You felt bad about a shirt, and then you realized you liked me. That was the basis for this relationship. You wanted to make up for some stupid mistake that had nothing to do with you. Maybe it was just your conscience, telling you you'd done a bad thing. Maybe you never card about me at all, and it was just guilt."

"Maybe it was!"

"Then you're _done!"_ Kurt's voice broke like shattering glass. " I don't care about the shirt, about Puck, about any of that protective stuff you feel. I don't care anymore!" Finn could see how red Kurt's eyes were, how the tears began to fall. He was numb to it all.

"You know what?" Finn asked, backing up, "You're right. I never cared about you at all. It was just the shirt. Well, you have the shirt back and you got what you wanted, you little bitch. You got to drool over the boy of your dreams and throw a hissy fit over nothing. Just like every other clingy girlfriend out there. And no one likes clingy girls. That's why they all end up like you'll be. Alone."

Finn turned stalking the stairs. As he reached the door, he turned around, ready to add more. But as he did, he only saw how Kurt fell back, landing in the egg chair. How he grabbed the white hat off his head and balled it up, biting into it as waves of tears fell from his eyes. But to Finn, it was all just. He'd made his point.

Finn Hudson was done.


	9. Part Nine, In the Right

Mah Lovies!

How I've missed you so. .3. I know this is a couple days old, but I've been fighting a war and a half getting to an accessible computer nowadays, and, of course, with like two chapters left, updates might be coming in slower. BUT I SHALL FIGHT THE POWER. .V.

Okay, who saw Laryngitis? Uh-MAYZEZING. I laughed, I teared up, I thought it was superspecialawesome. I'd say it earned its rightful part of fourth favorite eppy, after Ballads, Wheels, and Preggers. I also found out that it's springtime in Lima.

Damn them.

But, enough about me. Let's get to the story, shall we? I really felt comfortable with Kurt this chapter, and I really think it's one of my better ones. I hope you all feel the same!

Lessthanthree, Rhapshody.

* * *

Kurt watched as Finn went up the stairs, each footstep sounding like a sonic boom. Why was that always how these things ended? With one boy unable, or unwilling, to go after the person who was, as always, running from their problems. This morning, if Finn had only gone after Kurt, stopped him before he got in the car, before Puck caught him like a stray animal and tossed him so easily in the dumpster, then laughed as Kurt slipped on ice and hit the back of his head on the dumpster side…

Kurt swallowed hard. He'd wanted Finn to be there so bad. To protect him. But that was never going to happen now.

Inside the basement, the little soprano was finding it hard to stand. This wasn't what he'd wanted. He'd wanted to make things better. His legs were weak, and as Kurt collapsed into the small chair, he had to wonder if he was going to have to barf in his hat. Hands shaking, he took the hat off, clutching it against his face, if only for the comfort of something that was stable. Tears rolled down his cheeks and he felt so stupid for crying. They hadn't even been going out, but it was now clear that Finn wanted nothing to do with him. They were just done now. Whatever the past couple of weeks were, it was all done.

Kurt caught his reflection in the mirror. He looked like a mess, strands of his hair falling all over the place, his eyes that gaudy red that came with crying like an idiot, he could see how his nose was running, and how the hat was pressed against all of it. He'd have to burn that hat. He'd have to burn this whole outfit. Kurt attempted to make himself look human, to compose his self.

'_You got what you wanted, you little bitch!'_

It was like hitting a physical wall of pain, the words ricocheting around in his skull. The truth of the situation and the reality set in, and Kurt felt his throat close and his body heave. He didn't even care. His lips were surrounded with soft material as he gagged up bile, then inched over to the trash can, where he sighed as he tossed the hat away. A weak gag reflex was not going to fix his problems.

Shivering, Kurt crawled over to his couch and lay down.

_That happened. That just happened. That just fucking happened. _

The strange thing was, even though a few seconds earlier he'd felt totally in the right, now all he wanted was to speak with Finn. To apologize for what he'd said, to say he'd been wrong. Looking at the stairs though, he knew he wouldn't. He'd fought with his dad like this before, where they'd just had screaming matches because nothing was right in the world. And Kurt knew his place in these fights. If he went up there and told Finn how he really felt, nothing would be solved. He was in a deep enough hole already.

He painfully went over the fight in his mind. Even as he sniffled on his couch, though, Kurt knew that he hadn't been all wrong. Finn was a jerk for being ashamed of him. But at the same time, he knew, it wasn't the same for Finn, who Kurt couldn't expect to be totally okay with everything just because Finn had admitted to liking him. Kurt rolled over, hugging a couch cushion. He had to let things simmer down. He and Finn would talk it out, he knew. Things couldn't stay this bad forever. Breathing deeply into the cushions, he considered calling Mercedes for help. Calling anyone, just so someone could tell him he wasn't in the wrong. It was okay for Kurt to expect Finn to love him, wasn't it? Or was it just as Finn had said, that Kurt was just another clingy relationship that ended before it had a chance to start? Kurt had no idea, but he figured Mercedes or Tina wouldn't know either. So he instead stared at the gray wall in front of him, hoping for peace.

He must've dozed off, because when he blinked back to consciousness the world was bathed in a glow of shadows and streetlights. Kurt, painfully stiff, rolled over with a choked cry of pain. Oh, his neck, ow. Ouch, ouch, the back of his head from this morning. Thankfully, he wasn't like Puck with his near-baldness. His thick hair would hide the softball sized bruise on the back of his head perfectly.

He should show Finn that bruise. Finn would get so pissed, he'd go right off and punch Puck in the jaw, cracking it in two. Then he'd walk over to Kurt and embrace him, lifting him off his feet and holding him close. And then he'd whisper-

'_I never cared about you at all.'_

Kurt, along with his various other pains, felt the impact of the insult like a smack on his bruise. He had to cough quietly to fight back the fresh waves of tears. Hand reaching for a lamp, he tried to figure out what time it was. Darkness came as quick as 4:30 in Lima during the cold months. According to the clock, though, it was six thirty. His father would be home in half an hour. Carol should have already arrived. Kurt almost had to smile when he realized there would be no way their little family would find out about all this drama.

Upstairs, Kurt could hear the distinctive clacking of Carol's boots against the floor. He flinched for a second as the door above opened.

"Kurt, are you down here? I've got dinner."

Kurt forced a light 'Yeah', out of his throat before standing, balking at the idea of facing Finn. If he was still mad, Kurt knew he didn't want to face any more arguments. And odds were, with Finn's track record of decisions based off anger, there was at least one chair kicked down upstairs and Finn was still steaming.

Getting to his legs, Kurt checked his reflection in the mirror, held back a gag, and did everything possible to look human. His eyes were beyond help, they always looked like crap after he cried, but after a quick clean up session with his clothes, a trip to the bathroom to get the taste of sic out of his mouth, and far too much struggle with a hairbrush, Kurt deemed himself presentable enough to be seen by others.

Still, seeing Finn seated at the kitchen table with half an egg roll in his mouth made Kurt want to run downstairs and repeat the sobbing process all over again.

Finn's eyes were cold as Kurt sat across from him, and deciding to be boring and using a fork to dig into his Orange Chicken, Kurt could almost feel the waves of anger still coming off of Finn. Perhaps this was why Finn was one of the few highlights of the Titans. Football was about his only release for rage.

And it was basketball season. Shit.

Kurt forced down the food, mostly staring at the table as Carol sat opposite him and tried to make conversation. It wasn't normal that they all sat down family dinner style, but Kurt had followed Finn's lead and so on, so there they were.

Carol, aware of the tension but apparently in no mood to address it, cracked open a fortune cookie. As was customary, the actual 'cookie' bits went into an empty salted pork container, and she unrolled the small piece of paper.

"Hm," she sighed, breaking the silence. Kurt looked up, trying to act interested, while Finn just glanced out of the corner of his eyes.

"Love is forgiveness." Carol read, then went on to lucky numbers and the website that printed the paper. Kurt couldn't help but look at Finn as the words registered, but his only reaction was a snort. Kurt decided to take the tone and go with it, and stood up from the table to make his way downstairs. He checked his phone, had a boring conversation with Tina about arm warmers, and went to bed absolutely miserable.

Finn never came down, and Kurt safely assumed he wouldn't be doing it any time soon.

xXx

When Kurt came around again, it was morning and he felt considerably less like crap. He had taken enough pain medicine to scare him a little, his wound was no longer swollen, and even though he woke up this time with the knowledge that Finn didn't love him, it was almost like old times. Yes, yes, there would be no Finn. What else was new.

He made considerable strides in looking like a human again, nice big sunglasses to hide his still swollen eyes, hair fixed in position, a new outfit from Christmas splurging hidden away to be worn after any dumpstering. Yes, as Kurt took a deep breath and readied himself to face Tuesday morning, he really thought he was ready.

Finn cornered him upstairs and Kurt tried not to cry.

Finn, too, looked considerably less like a dragon. His eyes were still dark and unhappy and he made no moves to show affection, but he wasn't screaming or being deadly silent, so it was an improvement. He made a point of staring at Kurt through the dark glasses, and as Kurt cocked his head in a question, Finn let out a rush of words in an exasperated sentence.

"It's over. I just thought you should know that. I know you liked what we had and all, but I didn't and I'm done. Sorry for making you cry. Oh, and stay away from Puck. I won't be protecting you anymore."

And then he turned and abruptly left the house, keys in hand.

Kurt managed to not break down, only nodding into thin air as he heard Finn's car pull down the street. So that was that then. It was over. Done with. The end.

Alright. It could have been worse.

Kurt ignored the fact that his stomach was in knots as he pulled into the parking lot, looking immediately for Mercedes or Tina. Or Artie. Or anyone that wasn't Finn or Puck. No dice, as Kurt saw the be-mohawked behemoth approaching him from the south side. This time, Kurt made no attempt to not bolt out of sight, hoping that if he at least made it to the doors then some of the apparently blind faculty would help him.

Of course, though, that was not about to happen. As Kurt tried to make it to the doors, there was Puck, and in one incredibly awkward motion Kurt felt his body become weightless, then land on Puck's shoulder. Kurt wanted to scream, be he had a feeling his cries would fall on deaf ears.

And so it went. It was strange, really, how Kurt was able to feel absolutely nothing but the uncomfortable pricking of a pen cap in his back. No sadness, no rage. Like a cloud of melancholy acceptance had come over him. He waited until Puck walked away, giving someone a high-five in the process, then crawled out to find Mercedes waiting for him by the door.

"So how'd it go?" she asked, choosing to ignore the fact that he smelled like old school-brand macaroni and cheese with a hint of mold.

"How does it look? These pants are going to stain. I'm honestly petitioning to get the color red removed as a flavor of anything. Blue, I can sometimes work with, but nothing stains like red."

"Not the dumpster," Mercedes said, rolling her eyes. "Finn. I just saw him. He looked so…normal."

"As normal as he did before he decided to make me his, I assume." Kurt said, picking up his pace and making his way into the girl's room. There had stopped being drama about that long ago. Most of the girl's had the usual mindset about Kurt. He was the cute lil' gay kid that they wanted to carry around like a Chihuahua. They weren't going to be sexually harassed, so they didn't care.

"So things are bad then?" Mercedes asked. Kurt made his way into a stall.

"Not as bad as…bad. We had a huge fight yesterday and everything went to hell. I feel terrible about it, but apparently Finn never actually liked me at all, and all his care was really guilt about the shirt."

Mercedes had known about the shirt incident for some time, but didn't know Finn's half of it. Kurt spared her the details.

"So he says he doesn't care about you?"

"Yep."

"Bull."

Kurt rolled his eyes, moving quickly to remove his decoy outfit and hand it out to Mercedes, who in turn handed him his other clothes. After two incidences of a sleeve or a pant leg getting dipped in a toilet, this became their routine.

"Finn cares about you, Kurt. Somewhere in that tiny head of his. Maybe it just takes longer to register all over 'cause he's so tall."

Kurt smiled, wrinkling his nose.

"If only. But if Finn has decided he's done with me, I've decided I'm done with the plots."

"You're still head over heels with him?"

"Never stopped."

"You, boy, are hopeless."

"Especially now without Finn to keep Puck off me. Ever since the first dumpster dip, Finn's been on Puck like a hawk, trying to keep him off of me, but this morning Finn politely informed me that he was done with that too. So now I've lost my Finn-surance. I'm doomed."

"You just need a distraction." Mercedes said kindly, facing him. "You've been gaga over Finn for too long now. You need a new beau, someone who appreciates you. You may be the only gay kid here, but you never let that stop you before. Why not Jesse? He's an airhead, but he and Rachel are on the rocks right now. Sounds just like your type."

Kurt laughed. Leave it to her to make his day brighter. "Thanks but no thanks. I'm done with the love stuff for now."

Mercedes shrugged, smiling at him.

"Just don't get too down, okay? Finn's in the wrong here, not you."

Kurt nodded, smiling back. Maybe things weren't going to be so bad. This wasn't the end of the world. Once day the pain would stop and Kurt could be happy again. He turned, ready to face the world with a flourish.

And promptly got an icy blue slushie to the face.

Damn it.

xXx

Finn stomped up the stairs, blood practically on full boil. His teeth were slicing into his bottom lip and he was fairly sure he couldn't feel his left thumb. Finn knew he got angry too easily, it was a curse. But it was a curse he carried well, slamming not one, but both doors on his way outside. He revved the engine in his car and prepared to pull out, before realizing he really had nowhere to go. He was in no mood to see Brittany or Santana, the only two people who wouldn't question his motives, Puck would be with Quinn and things were still a mess with him, and for the life of him he couldn't think of a person he could go to.

'Oh, you know Artie, just relationship trouble with my boyfriend. Lah dee da.'

No. He decided he was perfectly content with sitting in his car and letting the radio drown out his anger.

What the hell was wrong with Kurt? Why didn't he understand that, as much as Finn cared about him, he still had boundaries and he still had lines he couldn't cross. Who's fault was that? And why was it so stupid for him wanting to care about a baby? Or not tell his mother he was dating his near-step-brother? Oh yes, Finn truly was the bad guy here.

'_Here's to all the Broken hearts tonight!  
Here's to all the far apart's tonight!  
Here's to all the girls and boys who lost their joy…  
They let it get away, You know it's never too late,  
Get up and start all over-'_

The lyrics on the speakers made Finn want to smack something. So he smacked the volume button and the radio quieted down. His mind was pulsing and he had a bitch of a headache. He knew he'd left Kurt in a very bad place, but told himself not to care. Kurt was the enemy. Kurt had insulted him, yelled at him, made him feel like shit. He had no sympathy towards the tiny brunette at the moment.

That got his mind going. All the things Kurt had put him through. The embarrassment, the confusion, the shame. Finn had never felt anything towards another guy before. Had Kurt even made him think he was gay?

Finn sighed. It was freezing in the car and he was getting nowhere. Not knowing what else to do, he turned on the signal and pressed his foot to the pedal. Where he was headed, he didn't know. But he needed to think.

There were few places in Lima where one could go to think, but one of the few was a small gas station in the middle of what some could consider the main 'town' parts. This was where Finn pulled in, planning to refill on gas and get a slushie. As he walked in, though, he found himself face to face with the sparkling hazel eyes of Quinn Fabray.

Finn wasn't sure to think when he saw Quinn. Part of him still loved her, or at least had a connection to the parts of her he didn't hate, and as she gave him a look that was of subtle recognition and little more, Finn had to fight the urge not to grab her in a tight hug.

"H-hey, Quinn." He said, his tongue dry. His anger at Kurt was replaced with the usual feelings of hurt he got when he saw the ever-forming baby-bump.

"Hi." She said, pushing a lock of hair behind her ear. She was waiting patiently as the guy behind the counter grabbed a hot-dog and slipped it into a bun. Finn raised an eyebrow but she shook it off.

"Cravings." She said, paying slowly. She took a second look at him.

"You look like shit." She said conclusively.

"I feel like shit."

"What's wrong?"

Finn stopped himself. He wanted to talk, he really did, but he didn't know how he would say it to Quinn. Or if Quinn would tell Puck. He wanted to trust her, but after what had happened before, he wasn't about to let his guard down.

"Something happen at home? Your mom and Kurt's dad? You can tell me, I'm used to fighting parent stories."

Finn tried not to laugh.

"Nope. Everything between those two is perfect. "

"What then?"

"It's personal."

"Personal."

"Very personal. Not something I'd want going around the school. Sorry."

"I'm not the gossip, Finn. That's Brittany and Santana. And you look absolutely miserable."

"It's…" Why was he spewing this? Why couldn't he stop himself from talking? He didn't want this information out, so why was he opening up to _Quinn, Puck's girlfriend, _enemy A-1? He didn't know. He stared at his lap and tried to stop himself, but his jaw wouldn't shut.

"K-k-kurt and me…had something going…but…it didn't go right and now everything's wrong."

He covered his mouth, literally covered his mouth, trying to stop the words. But boom. They were out. Finn wanted to cry.

"Please don't tell Puck. He'd kill me."

He forced himself to look at Quinn whose face was of sheer shock. Without pausing, she grabbed Finn's hand and dragged him out of the store, towards her car. She practically tossed him in the passenger seat before getting in the driver's side. Her car was warm and smelled like vanilla.

"What." She said as she blasted the heat "The hell."

"I don't know." Again! Word vomit! "Like, we talked this out, there was all this drama, and suddenly I feel like I'm in love with him. But not anymore. Like, I don't know. There was so much wrong with everything."

"You." Quinn said, looking unusually slow, "And Kurt?"

"Yes, okay? We thought we had something. But we, we broke up before anything happened. Like I said. Drama. And now we just had this huge screaming match, I don't know Quinn. Maybe it was just me on the rebound."

"Don't even try and make this about me." Quinn quipped. "But, I'm sorry, it's still not registering. How did you…fall in…have something…Kurt?"

Finn looked at her. He wanted to keep talking, keep word vomiting, but he was distracted by a small picture of Puck on the dash. As Finn's eyes hit it, he locked up.

"You don't have to worry about Puck." Quinn said, taking the picture and turning it over. "I still love him, but I know what would happen if I told him. I know you're gonna think this is bull, but you can trust me."

Finn sighed, defeated. He needed this, a confidant, someone on his team. He looked out the window at the freezing outside and just let the words go.

"I don't even know what the past few weeks were with us. But, I guess, ever since I first saw Kurt, I wanted to protect him, help…"

And so it went, Finn told Quinn everything he had inside of him. The shirt, the protectiveness, how he was now thinking it was all fake, and how Kurt had ruined it all.

"So," Quinn said, "He just expected you to come right out and be all…oh hay, I'm suddenly so…open? In School? _Our School? "_

"Right?" Finn exclaimed. It was freeing, just getting it all out. And even if he did have some doubts about Quinn, this was the girl who planned on letting him father a baby that wasn't his based on who she loved more. Somewhere, that counted as a plus for her. Better yet, she was agreeing with him.

"That's ridiculous! Doesn't he know what would happen to you? You've worked very hard on your social status, Finn. That would kill you."

"I know! So now I'm thinking that maybe…maybe I was kind of manipulated into it. I mean, yeah, I like Kurt, he's a nice guy. But I really have to wonder how much I really, really…like him. You know?"

"Yeah," Quinn said, nodding. "Well, I think you did the right thing. That kind of pressure on you is unfair. You shouldn't look so beaten up about it. You're in the right, here."

Finn exhaled. In the past half hour, he'd gone through enough emotions to power Houston. But now that things were simmering down, he finally felt human again. He still didn't know how he was going to face Kurt without having another episode, but he figured he was better off than before.

"Thanks Quinn. It was really great talking to you."

"Yeah, it was…I still like you, Finn. You know that. Puck's my boyfriend and all, but you're still important to me."

There was a brief moment of happiness, an exhalation, and Finn was on his way back to his car, then home.

Things were going to get better. Finn would go back to the way things were. He still had friends, he still had a life. This little incident didn't have to put a dent in anything. Finn smiled as he settled into the house, just a few minutes before his mom got home with dinner. Finn happily munched the food, wondering how to say something cheerful. Things were good.

Until Kurt came upstairs looking like he'd been hit by a truck.

Damn it.


	10. Part Ten, Bruises?

And so it is, the antepenultimate chapter. .o. Right? Right? Well, I'll admit, I don't like this chapter much. It's a lot of dark feeling and sad things, but this should be a CHEERY OCCASION. Ffff!

But. I have little to say here. Read these words of which things are written and whatnot.

(Oh, by the way guys, 100 reviews? Not ONE of them 'negative'? Do you KNOW what that does to me? DO YOU. c8 )

-Float-float-float-Rhapshody.

(Hopefully this isn't the chapter where everything goes to poop. .n.)

* * *

Days passed. Hours melded, and before long it had been a week since the incident. This had no real significance, really, save for the fact that in a week's time, things had smoothed out, contorted, and life became that regulatory shade of gray known as 'Normal.' For Finn, who was once again trying to achieve the emotional stability of a regular human being, he couldn't have wished for more.

As there was little he could do about his living situation, Finn skillfully and almost wordlessly migrated upstairs into the living room, where he spent the majority of his time. He became a near-stranger to Kurt in the house, only really speaking to him when they crossed paths for dinner or going to school. Finn knew he wasn't helping Kurt, giving him the cold shoulder and all, but he was also on a mission to strike Kurt from his mind. He'd thought he'd gone through some emotional trauma with babygate, but that was nothing in comparison to this.

He wasn't shutting Kurt out of his life because he was mad, no, he just didn't want to go back to where they'd been.

Could it have been done with a little more poise than completely locking him out of his life like he was some sort of contagious disease? Probably. But Finn didn't want to risk it. He had been that close to crossing the line, to go from more than friends into uncharted territory. It scared the crap out of Finn and he was no longer going to try it. He'd dipped his toe in. The water was laced with sharks.

At school, though, things were easier. Since speaking with Quinn, Finn had slowly but surely inched away from his position as a secondary pariah with Rachel, and had started to move back in with his old crowd. Those that would still have him, of course. This mostly included his fellow Glee students, those that didn't travel in Kurt's pack. He still got a glare or two from Mercedes or Tina at least once a day, but he shrugged it off. Yes, they'd broken up. Surely, the sun would rise again without their awkward closed mouth kisses. If Finn was so willing to forget the little affair, why wasn't everyone else?

But it didn't matter to him. He was back in his comfort zone. He and Quinn were nowhere as close as they'd once been, but between her, Santana, Brittany, Matt, Mike, and a halfhearted peace treaty with Puck, he had a fair amount of what he could consider 'friends'. Things with the other half of Glee became less important after that.

He should have been ready, though, for the question and answer round that came with such a group of people. Moreover, one specifically.

"So dude," Puck said one day as the two walked down the hallways of William McKinley on their way out of the building, "Way to disappear off the face of the planet. Ever since you and the gay kid started hanging out…"

Finn tried not to flinch. Inside, his blood turned to ice. He wasn't sure when Puck had accepted him as a human being again, probably before he'd let himself notice, but nowadays he was usually around Puck for a good half of his day. The two had found a lukewarm area between their squabbles to call friendship, and Finn had decided it was the safest he could get. If Puck was with him, he was respected. He was also guaranteed Kurt-a-way.

Finn shook his head.

"Stupid. I know."

"What was with that, anyway? You two going out?"

Finn tried to drum up something that resembled a smile.

"Ha, funny. Our parents are going out. I didn't have a choice."

"Phff. Sure. I've had to keep tiptoeing around him now, using most of my raw Puck Force One power on nerds. God forbid I do something to your golden boy."

Finn's hands formed fists. He jammed them into his pockets.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means," Puck said, either oblivious to Finn's terror or so absorbed in his memories of nerd beatings he didn't notice the fact that Finn's eyes were dark with rage. "That besides the occasional dumpster toss or Slushie to the face, I haven't been able to beat on him in forever. If I do, sure enough, there you are acting like some kind of...angry goose mom. All defensive."

"I've never done that." His voice was dark. He had to bite his tongue to keep from letting out a stream of compressed anger.

"Please, Finn. If I even give the guy a shove, you're there staring at me like I'm some kind of maniac. I figured you were just trying to like, impress some chick with your manly, like, niceness, but since you two have moved in together…"

Finn was ready to burst.

"It's nothing, okay? His dad's a beast, and if Kurt was walking around like some sort of punching bag, if his dad ever saw like, half a bruise he'd sue your ass for a hate crime. You like being able to leave your house, right?"

"Bro, Chill." Puck said, giving Finn a look. "It's not like I'm gonna kill the kid. It just feels wrong, seeing him being able to walk down the halls without a care in the world. He should be like the rest of them. Scared, ready for the next attack."

'_He's not my responsibility anymore. He never was. He thinks he's so strong, let him deal with Puck on his own.'_

"You know what, I don't even care. I just don't want his dad to break your jaw. He bruises easy."

There was no missing the feral glint in Puck's eyes as Finn basically gave him the all-clear. It sent cold shivers down his spine, and Finn almost wished he had the chance to retract the statement. His knuckles were white as he shook his head.

_He's not mine to protect. He doesn't need me. I don't want to help him. That was nothing._

He swallowed the last word that slid into his mind as he got in his car.

_Liar._

_xXx_

Finn had to admit, he was mildly surprised at the way Kurt managed to avoid him. He'd assumed at first that there would be squabbles, fights, attempts to pick up whatever they'd had. But pretty much as Finn announced it was over, Kurt agreed. There were no late night conversations, passing comments, and Finn literally hadn't made physical contact with Kurt for at least a week, maybe two. He assumed it would make it easier, the breaking up thing, but it soon began to get on his nerves. Where was the Kurt who would hire a skywriter to get his attention? Finn didn't really know, seeing as he was trying to make Kurt's existence void and all, but he couldn't help but begin to worry. Whenever he did run into Kurt he would check, looking to see if he looked any more tired or stressed than usual, but it was always the same. Kurt was as pristine as ever. It was only when Finn would meet his eyes and see their cold, careless, dull stare when the shivers would prick his spine.

One of the times, he forced himself to talk. The words were bitter in his mouth.

"Kurt," He said one day as Kurt rummaged through the kitchen. As Finn walked in, Kurt was pouring a glass of water. His movements were sharp and precise, and as Finn walked in there was no missing the slight tensing, almost a flinch, before returning to normal. Finn ran his tongue over his teeth.

"Uhm, Kurt. So,uh, no hard feelings, right?"

He would not get in a long conversation. There would be no screaming, no yelling, no crying. He prepared for some sort of emotional outburst. Looking at Kurt, who was gripping the water like he'd die if he didn't, Finn braced himself for the explosion.

"Yeah." Kurt's voice was dry, flat. "No hard feelings." And then he walked out.

Finn didn't know why the answer made him feel like the scum of the earth, but it did. And there was no way to fix it. Finn could think of a dozen ways to apologize, to try and make things better, to try and make Kurt happy, but paranoia plagued him. He worried that if he made the apology too melancholy, like the no hard feelings talk, then absolutely nothing would be accomplished. And if that happened he couldn't go around making little apologies all the time, just hoping once to see Kurt smile or to see light in his eyes. Beating the dead horse would get little accomplished.

At the same time, there was no way in hell he was going to put on a show. Every time he thought back to the 'Love Me Dead' performance, and he tried not to as much as possible, it made his stomach turn. How he had been so sappy, how he'd used the word love. It all felt wrong to him now, and he knew there was no song out there that said 'Sorry I ripped you to shreds and hung you out to dry, you jerk for making me feel things like that, don't act like the walking dead and smile, dammit.'

The emptiness between the boys didn't stop at school. At home, at those inopportune times when family forced them to be together, the silences were long and cold. Finn never met Kurt's eyes, and Kurt made no attempt to act like he cared. They didn't do it subtly or with any tact, and even walking into the room when the family was there-Finn, Kurt, Carol, and Burt- was like walking into a room with only a wet cat and an aggressive dog, side by side, but unable to move. They tried so hard to ignore the tension.

Only this time, for Finn nor Kurt, there was no bliss in their ignorance.

It was on Thursday, after glee was wrapping up and everyone prepared to head home, when everything Finn had ever believed, loved, fought for, or wanted was dismantled and soon after fell apart in front of him.

It was when that post-glee high was fading and everyone was calming down. There was a month until regionals and New Directions was good to go. Even with the drama between Finn and Kurt, the club was working harder than ever on dance routines to roundhouse kick Vocal Adrenaline out of the theater. Slowly but surely, the club was becoming more and more confident in their ability to move. With a Killer solo by Mercedes, Puck in the spotlight of another song, and a third number hard in the works, it was foolish to assume the club was headed anywhere but up.

Finn was just grabbing his backpack and heading for the door when Brittany found him. Finn liked Brittany. Not as a potential girlfriend –he usually required his partners to have an Iq higher than that of a balloon- but she was simple and didn't ask too many questions. Finn hardly noticed as she kept pace with him and was only half paying attention as she finished her sentence.

"…those bruises."

"Hm?" He asked, turning to her. He pulled a headphone out of his ear.

"I said, you should tell Kurt to put ice on his bruises."

"Bruises?"

"Yeah. I got one on my chest when I fell out of bed one morning, but I put ice on it and it went down before I went out with Adam Fervera. It was way better by that night."

Finn paused, taking a moment to process the information. Not pausing to ask how one falls out of bed in the morning, he rewound the conversation in his head, stopping a second later.

"Wait, what bruises on Kurt?"

"The ones on his arm and all over his back." Her voice was simple and void of emotion.

"...When did you see Kurt's back?"

"Cheerio practice. Like, every day for a week when we do our third routine and he has to do the tuck and roll thing, You can see then when he bends town or his shirt comes over his shoulders." Brittany paused, and Finn swore he could see a spark of intelligence break through her eyes before fading back into oblivion.

"I thought it was nothing…Is he okay?"

Finn tried not to roll his eyes. Only Brittany.

"Uh," He managed, trying to quell the panic rising up in him. "N-no, it's uh, it's okay. I'll tell him about the ice. Thanks, Brittany."

Brittany, rapidly deteriorating back to the mindless elf she was at every other time of the day, nodded cheerfully. Somewhere in the back of his mind, Finn wished he had something shiny, just to see what would happen when he threw it. But this was not the time. His mind began racing as he tried to pull the pieces together, pretty much forgetting that his goal was, and had been, to not worry about Kurt.

He began to pick up his pace, cussing up and down when he realized he had no plan to go on. Kurt still looked at him like he was a dead possum on the side of the road, and Finn really had no one else to turn to. He wasn't about to ask Puck, who he assumed was the main bruise- creator, and get questioned again. He thought about asking Mercedes, but one thought of facing her fury sent him a step back. He wasn't even facing her and he had to step back.

_Calm down,_ he told himself, running his hands through his hair. _You don't need to panic. This is Brittany. The same Brittany who wanted to be a sock when she grew up. It could just be shadows. I would have noticed if he was that bad. Wouldn't I?_

_No. _His conscience answered back.

Finn's stomach turned hollow. He forgot about not caring and trying to keep a hold on himself. He began to make his way towards the car, the wheels spinning in his mind. He wondered if he could ask Tina or Artie, but had no idea if they'd know, and knew how that conversation would come off.

'_So. Have you guys seen any bruises on Kurt? –'s back?'_

No. There was nowhere he could go. No one to ask. He was trapped.

_I can't panic until I see. That much is easy. But I can't just ask to see. Kurt will…I don't even know what Kurt will do. I abandoned him... and now, and this-"_

He forced his eyes off of the rear view mirror. He was going to end up in a car wreck if he kept this up, and then he'd have a lot more to worry about than some supposed bruises. He forced his mind to watch only traffic lights and stops signs until he got home, at which point he walked inside, sat down on the couch, and picked up where he left off.

_Shit. _He said quietly, staring at his hands. _Shit, shit, shit._

That was about as far into a plan he'd gotten when Kurt walked in the door, dressed in his cheerio's uniform, staring blankly at his iPod. As Finn shifted, trying to hide the fact that he was looking but only managing to look like he was staring at Kurt's ass, Kurt faced him with that hollow stare. It was only Finn who got that look. Anyone else, even Puck or Quinn, got the usual cocky 'I'm better than you and you don't matter' raised eyebrow stare. But when Kurt faced Finn, his eyes said so much more.

"K-kurt-" Was as far as he got before Kurt turned on the worn path to his basement. Finn got up to follow, but was cut off as a door slammed behind the smaller boy. Finn didn't dare try and follow. When Kurt was in that sort of mood, even Burt gave him his space. Finn sucked in a rush of air as his fist slammed the wall. He didn't want to fight. He just wanted to talk. He just wanted…peace.

He returned to the living room, nursing his hand. That was no way to solve problems he knew, punching things, but it was the best option he had. He collapsed on the couch a moment later and tried to think of a way to bring it up. He went over a scenario or two, but nothing panned out in his mind. He wasn't like Kurt, crafty and clever. He worked off of emotion and feeling. And as one last scenario blasted through his mind, he definitely got an emotion and a very, very bad feeling.

He got up and poured a glass of water.

xXx

Five hours later, shadows stretched across the living room floor and Finn was still in his spot on the couch. Only now, he was practically shaking and his legs were squeezed together so tight he was losing feeling in his feet. In front of him on the coffee table, two glasses were empty next to a large pitcher filled roughly half way with water. Even looking at the pitcher made Finn want to die. He closed his eyes and ran through his plan again, knowing he was, in fact, completely insane. But at the sound of the basement door opening, Finn knew it was the only way. There was no other way to make himself go through with it. He tried to look nonchalant as Kurt walked in and out of view, on his way to the bathroom, before doubling over in pain. His bladder was dying. Shivers of pain smacked his stomach as he inched around, listening for the shower sounds.

It wasn't time yet, but he hoped it was soon. If his mother or father came home in the midst of this, well, he wasn't about to face that possibility. He just tried to drown out all noise as, a room away, shower sounds spread across the house. About four minutes in, Finn forced himself to his feet.

_What am I doing? _He asked, a third of the way there. Ouch, ouch, it hurt to stand.

_This is insane. I'm a disgusting pervert._ The door was in view. Shortly thereafter, the water stopped. Finn's stomach was in knots.

_That bastard beat him till he bruised. _Another step forward.

_I'm not doing this. _Step.

_This is happening. _Step.

_What if I'm wrong?_ Wavering step.

_What if it's true? _His hand reached for the handle.

_I have to pee. _The door creaked, turned, and there was Kurt.

Out of the shower and naked as the day he was born.


	11. Part 11, Purple

And you though I'd leave you such a cliffhanger? Ha, I say, HA! Extra exclamation point!

Butbut. You get on to reading, I'll meet you at the bottom.

* * *

Finn might have pissed himself. Literally. He had no embarrassment or shame, and as much as the urge to be socially conscious was there, Finn didn't avert his eyes. For the past five hours, Finn had thought only of leaking sinks, waterfalls, and Kurt's delicate light skin marred by ugly, purple marks. He'd have thought himself prepared, he'd tried to conjure up the worst case scenarios, but as Kurt saw him, the dead look not even registering over the sheer fear and confused rage, Finn tried not to lurch forward. Kurt had a towel in his hand and moved quickly to cover himself as the realization set in, but there was no hiding it.

Finn shuddered as his eyes fed. There was no perversion, no feeling other than that of utter shock and disgust. His mouth opened soundlessly, but there were no words to come. Only as Kurt twisted, covering as much as his body as possible, could a choked cry be heard.

They. Were. Everywhere. Finn hadn't been kidding when he said Kurt bruised easily, something he'd found out over winter break after, quite possibly, the world's most awkward sledding incident. But he was strong and a quick healer. The sheer amount and shade of wounds that painted Kurt's body told Finn that 1) they'd been there for a while and, 2) they weren't stopping.

As Kurt tried to hide himself, Finn took inventory. The entirety of his right shoulder blade was one big yellow-green mess, there was an apple sized purple mark just above his solar plexus, and a couple of smaller marks around his chest area. Finn was angry enough by then, but as Kurt twisted around, reaching for a robe or something to hide behind, the mere sight of his back made Finn want to cry.

It was a mess. A map of wounds in every color of the bruise rainbow. Some were faded, some looked fresh and new. Finn could just see it over and over again in his mind, out the corner of his eye, the time's he'd looked away and heard only a clattering and a laugh. His stomach heaved.

"Fuh-fuh-Finn! What the _hell_ are you _doing_? Get- close the…Ffff-"

Finn blinked, realizing that it had literally been maybe five seconds since he'd walked in the door. His mind filled with words, excuses, anything that could come out of his mouth. He didn't realize how his hand was gripped around the doorknob, now throbbing with pain.

"Why didn't you tell me." He surprised himself with his tone, dark and cold.

To say Kurt was caught off guard was an understatement of frightening proportions, and even as he covered the last of his naked skin in a light blue robe, it was clear it hadn't registered what Finn was asking. Only as Kurt tied the knot on the robe furiously did he blink. His hands slowed. His mouth twitched. He looked at the ground.

"Get out, Finn." He said, regaining his composure. His face was absolutely red with embarrassment. Finn stood his ground.

"It was Puck."

Kurt's voice creaked. His eyes were red. "Yeah. It was Puck."

"And you just…you didn't say anything?"

"To who?" Kurt asked, grabbing a hairbrush –only Kurt- and running it through his wet mop of hair. Finn, forgetting his bladder, who was home, and everything else that wasn't Kurt's well being, moved forward. He had no clue what was happening, but there was no fear as he approached.

_Me, you dumbass! _Was his original answer, but he kept it in. He'd made it perfectly known how willing he was to help Kurt during the past couple of weeks. A pang of self-hate hit him hard.

"Anyone. You could have told someone! Mercedes, Schu, a fucking police officer-"

" I don't need help, Finn! I've always handled Puck perfectly fine! Yeah, he's gotten a little more violent. It's nothing I can't live with. And who are you, all concerned and actually looking at me for once?"

Finn stopped short. The answer to that question, he honestly didn't know. He turned away, figuring Kurt was in no mood to be embraced. The truth burned in Finn's mind, be he didn't address it. He turned back to Kurt.  
"You're going to get yourself killed."

"I'm. Fine."

_You're not fine! You look like you're half dead!_

"I could have helped you." He hissed.

"You're the last person in the world I'd go to for help. Just…just go, Finn. This doesn't have anything to do with you."

Finn stared at him. His inner monologue was on fire with words, sparks nigh-flying from his mouth. He wanted to grab Kurt by his purple shoulders and shake him until he was a vegetable. _This has everything to do with me! This was my fault! You-I-we-_

Finn turned, unable to stare at Kurt for a moment longer. He had no idea where he was walking, well yes he did, the basement had the only other toilet in the house, but he was no longer able to even see those marks.

This was his fault. Kurt was strong, stronger than Finn had ever been, but that was emotionally. Kurt might have had a lightweight body and a smaller stature, but there was no one more proud or brave than Kurt Hummel.

It made sense now, why Kurt was looking at Finn like he was garbage nowadays. It wasn't out of hate or spite. It was pride. Finn had made Kurt out to be something so weak and vulnerable. When it came time that such qualities were acceptable, Finn had made it impossible for Kurt to ask for help. The conflict within the smaller boy made Finn want to bang his head against the tiled wall underground.

Wheels in Finn's mind turned. That day with Puck, he might as well given him a get-out-of jail free card. Finn had told him where to hit him, how to hit him, and that Finn would do nothing about it. Finn had become the antithesis of what he'd wanted to be. In the interest of protecting his own self, he'd thrown Kurt, the person he wanted to care for and have more than anything in the world, to the dogs.

Finn ambled out into the basement, Kurt's room. It was unchanged from the last time, everything gray and white, his clothes neatly laid out, his mirror in the corner perfectly reflecting the disgusting monster Finn saw himself as. Finn took a step closer. Over the past three weeks, he'd looked at himself in the mirror a lot. Well, not a lot as much as how much could be expected for that of a teenage boy. Those had all been passing glances of course, checking to make sure his face was clear and his hair was done. But as Finn got closer and closer to the mirror, soon so close that his breath made a little puff of gray on the surface, he got in a good long look.

The hair on his arms stood up and he blinked away tears. He knew those eyes. Dead, emotionless, supressed and endlessly proud. He and Kurt were alike in so many more ways than he'd ever let himself know. Finn's hand gripped the side of the dresser the mirror stood on for support. His thumb brushed the handle, and Finn knew immediately what was in the drawer.

Numbly, his hand reached in, feeling the familiar soft fabric of the white shirt. Finn swallowed a dangerously inappropriate laugh.

He'd said that was the only reason he even bothered to care for Kurt.

What Bull.

He pulled the shirt out and looked at it, feeling the waves of nostalgia in his mind. The day it had happened, the night he'd watched it on the floor, the endless conversations he and Kurt had gone through, always Finn feeling so guilty, always Kurt saying there was nothing to be guilty about. Finn gripped it tighter. He did have a reason to be sorry. If there ever was someone who had reason for remorse, it was Finn Hudson as he stared at that white shirt.

He reached back in the drawer. The next item was the picture, kept always in the drawer for safekeeping. It was funny, Finn knew, how familiar and simple it was now. In the beginning, the first time he'd seen it, it had taken him a few seconds to really take it in. Separate the shapes, the colors, taking time to find the two boys in the living room. Now though, as he studied it, it was clear as day. Two boys together, happy, at peace. Finn set the picture down.

There were other things in the drawer. The Bow-tie Finn had gotten Kurt as a late Christmas gift, the wallet and chain that Kurt had picked out especially for Finn, sunglasses, a two dollar bill. Finn studied a tiny piece of paper that was at the bottom. He picked it up with nothing left to lose.

"Love is forgiveness."

Finn choked, almost tasting the words. He was no longer fighting back tears, just letting them fall out of his eyes. The phrase sounded so cheesy and repetitive. Who hadn't heard that? The first time Finn had heard it, he'd passed it off as cliché and stupid. The fact that the words now had meaning to him was almost too much to handle.

Only now, he knew it wasn't Kurt's forgiveness Finn was seeking. Kurt would forgive him a thousand times over no matter what Finn did. It was the inevitable truth of the person that was Kurt Hummel.

But no. It wasn't Kurt's forgiveness Finn needed to love Kurt.

It was his own.

xXx

The days rolled around like clouds overhead and time seemed to have little meaning to Finn. The bruises incident had happened on Thursday. On Friday, Finn had 'heavily advised' Kurt to stay home, informing him that if he didn't, he'd rip Kurt's shirt off and take him to the police. His original plan had been to beat Puck to a gelatinous mass, but Kurt wasn't dumb enough to not see it coming.

Kurt was, by no means, ready to look at Finn like a human being again. After their confrontation, Kurt had met Finn halfway up the stairway. Finn had put everything back to normal by then, and had made it look like nothing more than sheer coincidence that he was anywhere near Kurt's stuff. The two boys had shared no words, but after the school conversation, Kurt had rolled his eyes.

"Don't do anything stupid, Finn. You'll just regret it."

Finn had nodded oh-so politely, planning on doing at anyway. When he'd faced Puck though, he'd been unable to do anything. He wanted to make Puck bleed like a dying animal when he was at home, but facing him at school where he was alpha male, nerd beating, slushie facial king was more intimidating than Finn would admit. Whereas Finn had planned on lecturing him on just how awesome Kurt was while making him into a Pur(ck)eree, he instead froze, realizing that, no matter how much he wanted to do it, Finn still had his own demons to face.

The next two days met Finn face on as the floodgates opened. Finn made a point to get out of the house and get some time alone, and found himself on the outskirts of town, sitting in his car, remembering. He'd long since stopped telling himself that Kurt didn't matter to him. No, he'd readily come to the conclusion that when Kurt smiled, the sun came out. He'd stopped calling it protectiveness or debt, stopped trying to make it anymore than what he wanted it to be.

Finn loved Kurt. The end.

But that did nothing to help the truth that Finn was still terrified. He didn't want to be, quite the opposite. He wanted to strut around like a stud with his perfect boyfriend at his hip and show the world how happy he could be. But that was Finn's glitch. He wanted to make everyone happy, no matter what it took. And in making everyone else happy, he'd left himself and Kurt out to dry.

He wanted to fix that. He wanted to fix it so bad. He had no clue how, though.

Until Monday, when opportunity showed up in the form of the six-foot-oh mohawk'd Jew known as Noah Puckerman.

Despite his revelation(s), Finn had said little to Kurt. All that day, as he'd given his approval to Kurt to come to school, He'd stuck within thirty yards of the little soprano as much as physically possible. He'd distracted Puck outside the school so that Kurt could (begrudgingly) get into the building, walked near him so that he could never get close to Kurt, and had done everything physically possible to keep the boy safe. By lunch, the effort of doing it nonchalantly left him exhausted.

His eyes were closed and his head was resting on his arms. This was not the production of his activities of the day though. Through the weekend, Finn had slept a total of roughly seven hours, counting the times he'd woken up and stared at the ceiling, punched his pillow in frustration, or stared out the window hoping that when the time came, he'd be brave enough to act on it. Now, as he sat in the midst of the lunch room, he felt very much the same. Kurt had said nothing to him, but his eyes also didn't look quite as dead as they had that morning.

-Slap, slap, laugh, laugh, bump.- Finn blinked open his eyes, wondering if he was hallucinating. Could your ear have hallucinations? The sounds of Puck's laugh, the jock's following laughter, their feet slapping the ground in that predatory way…Finn had gone back in time.

Finn responded to a nudge on his shoulder, looking up to see Puck grinning as he waded though the tables, aiming straight for the table where Kurt sat alone. Finn's lips made a definitive 'Ffff' sound and his heart rate quickened.

Of course. The Glee girls, the one's that kept Kurt company, were doing rehearsal for a mainly female dance. Artie was God-knows-where, and really, there was no one else willing to share a seat with him. Finn felt a shiver of fear he hadn't felt since September. His hands made fists. He knew this feeling, he knew this fight. He knew what he had to do.

He didn't exactly feel his body reacting, getting up, and making a beeline for the table where Kurt sat reading quietly, unaware. Finn had the advantage of a clear pathway, and he was able to weave his way through, keeping pace with Puck until the last second when he saw Kurt look up, his mouth open in a gasp, staring in horror at the two full-to-the brim Red and Blue Slushy cups. Finn picked up speed. Puck saw him and nodded with a wink, ready to pour. Finn felt his 'No!' catch in his throat. His arm shot out, grabbing Puck's. The red slushy stopped and the icy red liquid bribbled onto Finn's hand.

"Finn, What-" Puck's voice was surprised. Below him, Finn heard Kurt mumble something quietly.

"Stop." Finn said. The word was so short, so weak, just one word that hardly mattered in the long run. But it was the word that had been caught in Finn's throat since the day in the shower all those months ago.

"Leave him alone. He didn't do anything to you."

"Dude, what's going on? You two got some sort of secret relationship going on?" Puck meant it as a joke. He didn't expect Finn to reach down with his free hand and grasp Kurt's shoulder.

"It's not much of a secret anymore."

In a sitcom, that was where the music would make that cliché broken record player sound, where the crickets would usher in, and everyone would turn and gasp. This wasn't a sitcom though, and as Finn publically declared the words that scared him more than death, pregnancies, and tarantula's, he was unable to process Puck's grin. Puck's arm turned, and a fountain of red slushie ran down Finn's head, shoulders, face, and back. The opposite arm lifted and poured a blue waterfall onto Kurt's shocked face.

"I knew it." Puck said, backing up and raising his arms. He looked ready to do a victory dance. Finn bit his tongue hard. His hand on Kurt's shoulder jumped a couple of degrees as Kurt grabbed it. Kurt squeezed it. Finn squeezed back.

"Gay! Ha! Finn, man, I totally called it. That's, that's, Quinn! Matt, I-" Words fell out of Puck's mouth, some insults, some dribble. If they were meant to be blows though, and Finn was fairly sure they weren't, they weren't landing. That wasn't to say that Puck's outburst wasn't sponging attention from the rest of the room. And between the fact that Kurt stood, that eyebrow raised in such a Kurt like fashion, and how the boys were a red and blue shade of mess, the attention of most of the room was caught. Finn puffed up his chest, confidence waning. What if they threw things?

Puck was laughing now, walking over to the table where the rest of the jocks and cheerios were seated. The girls weren't there. Finn wouldn't be able to measure Quinn's reaction. He didn't care much. His hand broke off Kurt's and snaked around his waist, pulling the boy in close. Their sides melded like a puzzle piece, the perfect fit.

"We should sit down." Kurt said, staring at the faces surrounding them. Some were shocked, some laughing, some just looking to see what everyone else was looking at. Finn nodded slowly and sat down, still holding Kurt close. There was a moment of awkward silence before the rest of the world turned back to its own business. Finn exhaled. He could feel Kurt's eyes, alive and wonderful, on him. He turned.

"You didn't have to do that."

"I know."

"You don't need to protect me." Kurt reiterated, looking at the table. It was already starting to stain. Finn nearly exploded into laughter as he realized he was wearing a white shirt. He'd never get the white back.

"I know. I want to. More than you'll ever know."

Their faces were inching closer.

"I missed you." Kurt said. His voice was soft and his breath tasted like spearmint.

"Me too."

Closer, closer.

"I love you." Kurt's nose touched Finn's softly.

Finn leaned in and kissed Kurt's blue-flavored lips with all the passion he had. It wasn't the weak, petty, almost contractual closed-mouth mistakes they'd had before. Finn pulled Kurt closer and Kurt angled his face up, pressing his icy-coated forehead against Finn's. Finn's lips twitched and he tentatively let Kurt open his mouth.

He was terrified. He had no clue what would happen next. People were going to turn on him and treat him differently.

He breathed in Kurt's sweet smell.

He didn't care.

* * *

How'd I do? :D

I will tell you this, from the moment I started this fanfiction I've had that closing scene in my head. Actually writing it out was THRILLING and SCARY.

Sorry, I'm in an ALLCAPS mood. .3.

So I'm gonna take a minute and let you all absorb that, then slowly let you know that we're not just done yet. .3. I think we have juuuust enough space left for an EPILOGUE. With FLUFF. And MUSICAL NUMBERS. I'm excited to get started on it. But I've written 6,000 words in one day. I'm just about ready to die. xD So I really, really, REALLY hope you guys liked it. I guess I shouldn't be doing the tearful goodbye's but...It's almost over! What am I gonna do with the other 86% of my day now? (Write a Glee/Doctor Who Crossover? What? ._.)

Okay, I need to stop. Expect a really sappy afterword after the Epilogue, though.

Gaspeh.

(Just in case you were wondering, This was supposed to be one big Part 10. But it was too long and there were far too many tone shifts. So I extended it so that Part 10 would have a nifty cliffhanger ending and I could stuff DRAMADRAMADRAMALOVE in Part 11. :3)

SOMUCHCAPSANDLOVE- rhapshody


	12. Part 12, Finnaly And Kurtain Call

It. Was hot. Maybe not out in the audience, where the air was open and ventilated, where nice big fans kept the air whirring around and the heat vents weren't so close to the back curtain they were two inches away from a fire hazard. Out in the nice padded seats where spectators and proud parents sat, everything was comfortable and manageable. Kurt, rapidly twisting and bowing, wanted to hit them. Lucky bastards.

The air on stage was thick, whether it was with tension, fear, or just really poor heat circulation. Sweat beaded on all the performers foreheads, and in the flashing lights that were a bitch and a half to pay for, each body glistened and shone. Kurt moved quickly, keeping perfect pace with the rest of New Directions. Their first number was ending. His heart thudded hard.

_Swear to shake it up if you swear to listen!  
Oh we're still so young, desperate for attention,  
I aim to be your eyes,  
Trophy boys, trophy wives!_

Swear to shake it up and you swear to listen!  
Oh we're still so young, desperate for attention!  
I aim to be... your eyes!

As they'd been practicing for months, all performers stopped on a dime. Kurt's lungs were beginning to ache, which was a good thing, he supposed. In the center of the stage, Artie, who had been leading the song in vocals, began to wheel away and the lights dimmed. Kurt felt his stomach turn fourteen different ways and the sweat on his face felt cold. Across from him, Finn watched with eyes that were equally, if not more, terrified. Slowly, the dancers began to move and separate, pairing up so that Mercedes was holding onto Mike in the traditional Waltz position, as did Rachel and Puck. The rest of the dancers migrated to the back. Kurt stared hard at Finn. He nodded, and Finn nodded back. Both boys walked to center stage and took up the position.

_Star crossed lovers…  
They say we're not meant to be  
'Cause the stars in the sky, and the fashion that they are aligned._

The dance began, slow and simple. It was as it had been the three hundred other times they'd danced it. But as the opening bars were played and the routine started, there was so much more fear and realization. Kurt tried not to shiver. Finn was staring into his eyes, their hands interlocked so tightly that they were both going white-knuckled. Finn exhaled, making his body relax. He mouthed words softly to Kurt.

_Let's do this._

It was still sort of unbelievable, how all of this had happened so fast. Looking back at the past four weeks, Kurt would still sometimes have to stop and ask himself how far into one of his little romantic comedy fantasies he'd gone. But this wasn't some dream, some cooked up over-hyped fantasy. This was real. And as the two boys began to move and sway in the center of the stage, Kurt knew it was only one other thing. Fantastic.

That wasn't to say, of course, that the world had happily progressed in the way of a fairytale or Disney Movie.

**A**fter that day in the cafeteria Finn had gone almost completely into shock, managing to spend another, oh, thirteen seconds with Kurt before politely getting up, escorting Kurt to a place where he could spend the rest of his day good and Puck-less, and promptly disappearing for the next seven hours. Kurt hadn't known what to think, he was on his own emotional high and all, so he'd just sort of slumped in a bathroom stall until Lunch was over, numbly changed into another outfit, and went through the rest of the school day in a haze. Of course, there would soon be no end to the questions that hit him from every angle, but at that point, he'd just sort of tuned out, let his mind go on auto-pilot.

Soon, the scenario would be going on in his head in an endless loop, becoming more or less real with each occasion. After going over it for about the thirteen-thousandth time, Kurt was sure it wasn't real. Thirteen thousand and one, though, made him feel the stickiness of the leftover blue shushie behind his ears. He could feel Finns hands, taste him, have the tangible experience.

What in the name of all things good and right in the world had happened.

Somehow, Kurt managed to make it home and into his room. He repeated the process in his room for a few more odd hours before there was a knock at his door. Kurt bolted upright. He'd been checking his phone every twenty seconds hoping it was him. But besides about 27 texts from Mercedes and a few others, he'd gotten no word. As the lanky teen descended the staircase, Kurt didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

"If you've come down here," He'd said in a tone that was ripe with wit, "To tell me that was all nothing, I will kill you."

That had prompted a smile. Oh, God, a real Finn Hudson smile. Kurt couldn't remember the last time he'd felt so wonderful. He wanted to let everything fall into place, right then and there. He'd wanted life to go to perfect land with no stops or bumps. But he couldn't. The past two weeks had still happened. He had the bruises to prove it.

"We're gonna have to talk about it." Finn had told him, sitting opposite Kurt on his couch. Kurt had nodded, terrified of how the conversation would turn. He'd forced himself to do it, though, to listen to Finn tell him all about the guilt, the rage, the fear. In the end, he'd begged for forgiveness and asked for a chance to start over.

Kurt had explained just how much of a hell his life had been over the past two weeks, unable to go to anyone for help, how angry and frustrated and trapped Finn had made him feel. How, no matter how sweet the gesture was, Finn couldn't let it be the only event in which Finn ever loved him. Not to say that he'd have to come to school and have hourly make-out sessions, but Kurt would not be ignored or be something to be ashamed of.

But he was really proud of Finn for the event. And he would one day be willing to forgive him for turning a blind eye to Puck's cruelty.

And he'd be happy to give it a second chance.

_I say if the future's been drawn out there's no point in living…  
I won't give up my love so that fate can have its way._

Back on stage, Kurt knew the looks would be coming soon. People, finished with clapping for the first number, would slowly begin tuning in for the second. It would be a slow song, so they'd all settle back and ready themselves. Then they'd have to have a double take and ask themselves '_are those two boys?'_

'_Yes.' _Kurt answered them, breathing in and pulling Finn closer. Behind them, the other two dancing couples did the same while the background dancers moved softly.

Kurt couldn't believe it was happening. He had to bite down hard on his tongue not to break out in an out-of-character grin. He took in a deep breath and sang out the chorus, his arms getting Goosebumps in the process.

_If the stars say that you couldn't love me,  
Are you telling me that you would listen?  
If the words make their way from your mouth,  
Don't ask my permission,  
All is forgiven…_

Kurt turned slowly and let his body fall in trust-fall position. He fell back far enough to startle himself before he felt Finn's strong arms wrap around his ribcage. Kurt reached up and grabbed Finn's tie, wrapping it around his wrist as Finn hauled him up, and Kurt relaxed into Finn's body.

It was wonderful, thrilling, en experience never to be forgotten. And Finn wasn't running.

**T**he news had gone over at school about as much as one would expect it to. Sometimes, Kurt could only stand by and feel guilty as he watched people Finn had always known and trusted turn and treat him like some sort of alien creature. It broke his heart to know he was the reason for such torture. But at those moments where Kurt was sure Finn would come up and shake his head, push him away, say it was over, the taller boy would just reach over and interlock fingers, leaning against him for support.

Wasn't that something. Kurt Hummel, Supportive Boyfriend.

The first week of the two of them being publicly together was nothing short of hell. Whilst they had been slowly dealing with their issues for a long time, working out kinks and smoothing over bumps, suddenly showing up to school and being together and not responding to the endless taunts was equivalent to walking into a sleeping child's room at midnight and flipping on the light switch. People were gonna react.

Kurt had lost count of the times people, everyone from Rachel Berry herself to people he'd never met before, had come up to him or Finn with one of two questions on their lips.

"So you're going out with Finn?" They would ask him, and depending on the person, Kurt would nod in a superior fashion or smile proudly. Only when Rachel confronted him did he allow himself the smugness.

"You bet we are. Tsk, Tsk, shouldn't have pushed him away. Unlike you, Your Majesty Queen of Drama, Finn doesn't settle for second best."

He'd then proceed to book it away, either to find Finn, a group of friends, or to avoid Jesse as he hunted Kurt down for calling him second to anything. Kurt knew how to handle the stares and the whispers, and he did it with the flair that only Kurt Hummel could. Such a fact was lucky for Finn, who had no way to deal with said whispers and stares, and who soon got many a lesson in how to deal with things as only Kurt Hummel could.

Time after time he'd be standing with him, chatting or whatever, when someone, usually someone Finn had known for years, would walk up with an air of confusion or displeasure, and it would be like the tone of the entire earth shifted. Things became sharp, focused, dangerous.

"So it's really true."

Kurt would inch closer to Finn, his smaller body pressed against a line of lockers, just able to see the meat head who's piggish presence was already smogging up Finn and Kurt's atmosphere. Finn didn't need to look up from the things he was getting. He would nod, numbing himself to the words. Kurt, knowing better than to toss a cocky look at a jock, instead relaxed his posture and breathed out.

Simple. Question answered. Lah-dee-dah.

"How long have you been a fag?"

Kurt saw Finn's hands ball into fists. He whipped his head around to glare at the jock. Said Jock did not respond. Only stared at Finn with a mixture of embarrassment and laughter. Kurt swallowed his rebuttal. Just like Finn always wanted to bask Puck's skull in when he gave Kurt a look, Kurt wanted to be the one to fight Finn's battles for him. Such was a process both boys were working on.

Finn rolled his eyes as Kurt had taught him. That was all the comment was worth. Hardly batting an eyelash.

"I dunno, man. Look, it's no big deal, okay?"

_Be satisfied, you great oaf. _

"So like, all those times we've been in the locker room and you've seen us guys, like uh, naked and stuff-"

Patience lost. Finn looked at Kurt for help. As always at these times, there was a fear and misunderstanding in Finn's eyes. That golden boy that wanted everything to just be okay was struggling. Floundering. Kurt feared the day when Finn had to decide whether or not to rejoin football. But that day was not today. And Finn was Kurt's boyfriend. And Kurt would make that well known.

"All those times didn't matter with you animals 'cause _he_ was thinking of _me_." Kurt quipped, grabbing Finn's hand and waiting for him to shut his locker before walking away with enough confidence and pride for the both of them. Soon enough, as the process was repeated and repeated, Finn would be able to shake off the words and taunts, able to take Kurt's hand, able to have his own pride.

But until that day came, and damn if it wasn't fast approaching, Kurt was there for him.

_Star crossed lovers, we do what we want to…  
Some learn the hard way,  
We all learn through consequence._

As the lights flashed haphazardly, Kurt whipped around, his grip on the tie unfaltering as he pulled Finn close to him. Behind them, the other two couples began to move in more choreographed ways. Their twirls were smooth and swift, a watery waltz with a little flair mixed in for good measure. The background dancers were doing their part as well, never trying to move or overshadow the others, pleased to be shadows in this performance for the ages.

**S**ometimes, Kurt still had to ask himself how they'd ended up actually getting the number. The boys had been about two weeks public (Three to regionals,) when the old song, a nice revisited version of Harder to Breathe by Maroon 5 had fallen through. It didn't have the spark needed, the choreography was lackluster, and after a hard argument among the club, it was decided the number needed to drop.

They scrambled, of course, to find something that met the requirements of a good crowd pleaser. They 'settled' on about seven different songs fourteen or so times before things began to get hopeless. Kurt hadn't been the original one with the idea, though. Finn had heard the other boy humming it once and had liked the tune. After looking it up, he'd hatched the plan. Of course, this was still Finn and the mere idea of being just _that _damn public scared him. He'd gone to Kurt who, while admittedly loving the idea, made it clear that he wasn't going to push Finn into something he didn't want.

They'd settled on a plan. Rehearsals had been bumped up so that the club would be meeting pretty much every day until regionals. If in three days the club hadn't found a new number, they'd bring a rusty version of it to Schu. If Schu didn't homophobe out of it, they'd present it to the club. From there on, they'd see how things went. Neither of them really expected it to happen, but they'd sat in Kurt's basement for three days all the same, working on the moves for each part, coming up with excuses to get it past Schu, and trying to make it sound like a legit reason.

They weren't just doing it, though, to show the world just how damn in love they were. Although Kurt would proudly admit that was one of the reasons, he and Finn both really did feel it would make them stand out in the competition. They had a crowd pleasing classic, a high energy beginner, all they needed was a good, pleasing middle.

Making it past Schu was simpler than either boy had imagined. Kurt took the lead as he led Finn into the music room after the rest of the club had left, but he'd blanked as far as pitching had gone. Looking at Finn helplessly, he'd tried to figure out a way to say 'Hey, we've got a great song with awesome choreography that promises to be a favorite. Oh, and it's got gay bits.'

That was basically the road they'd taken, Kurt looking at Schu with an expression of pride and nervousness as Finn struggled through the idea. At first, it looked like the music teacher was going to shoot it down. But as they showed him their ideas and sang out a few words, the teacher slowly nodded. He wasn't sure how it would be received, but it seemed like something that would give them the upper hand. All they had to do was get it past the rest of the club.

And, of course, Rachel shot it down so fast it left a small crater in the tile between Kurt and herself. But with the support of Mercedes, who knew if they didn't do it then they'd no doubt end up with a Rachel/Finn single number with the rest of them singing background. Once this was pointed out, a few more members warmed up to it. Mike, Matt, Brittany and Santana, Tina and Artie, Quinn, one by one the group warmed up to the idea. Before long, the only two left opposing was the impeccable Rachel Berry and the great stone-minded Noah Puckerman.

Finn and Kurt had made a point to avoid Puck, for no other reason than the fact that they were terrified. Puck preyed on the weak and hapless, and after the original outburst in the cafeteria they had no idea how he would come around. Things went as expected pretty much, Finn got his first dumpster dip (While Kurt bolted for the door, oh the romance,) and the pair were barraged with slushie facials and the whatnot. Some of these came from Puck, some didn't. Whether this was the result of them avoiding him or Puck planning something dastardly for them, they'd soon find out.

But as tension rose in the choir room, as the rest of the willing room stared down at the fidgeting nay-sayers, both the eyes of Finn and Kurt were on Puck. They'd accounted him as their biggest issue. Kurt could just see Puck, looking stone faced and cold against the rest of the room. Rachel was spouting off excuse after excuse after excuse, words falling through the air like the screeching of an annoyed bird. Eyes darkened and lips turned to frowns, and before long it almost seemed as though a riot was on the way. It was only as Puck stood up, running a hand through his narrow strip of hair and shaking his head.

"Rachel, will you _shut up?_"

Rachel, about four percent through a twenty-minute rant on how, even though it should be accepted, homosexuality was still negatively viewed through most of the conservative town and how an openly gay performance would bring the club's chances of winning down in flames, stopped as Puck's voice boomed over the room.

"It's not like they're gonna be doing it on stage, geeze. And if it's gonna be something that's different and exciting, why shouldn't we do it?"

Puck hadn't met Kurt's eyes, but he saw Puck's dark gaze linger on Finn's for a fraction of a second before breaking away. Puck made his way over to the rest of the club who were watching, open mouthed and astounded. To be fair, Kurt felt the same way.

It had taken a few more lectures and twenty minutes to get Rachel to fold, ('You all hate me! You do! You thought I'd be okay with this just because of my dads? You're dragging this club down and I won't be taken with you!' She stormed out for about ten minutes before coming back in a huff and agreeing.) Somehow, the boys had managed to do it.

_I say if the future's been drawn out then nobody's living.  
I won't give you up love, so fate can have its way.  
Its way._

If the stars say that you couldn't love me,  
Are you telling me that you would listen?  
If the words make their way from your mouth,  
Don't ask my permission,  
All is forgiven.

**K**urt hadn't been there, at first, when he heard some random kid mention something about Puck and Finn. He'd been walking, tittering with Tina about something when he'd heard half a sentence that held the words 'Homo' and 'Puck'. Stopping dead and giving Tina a look to stop time, Kurt had tuned in just soon enough to hear the jock say that Puck had found Finn and that they'd exchanged words and had ended with a friendly hand-to-shoulder gesture. Well, the way they'd put it was that they'd talked and hugged and one of them was wondering if Puck, too, was gay. This caused a small amount of blood loss in Kurt's lip as he bit into it.

With Tina on his heels, the smaller boy had scoured the school until he eventually found Finn, talking pleasantly with Quinn and poking at her belly. Their motions weren't flirtatious, but friendly and teasing. Kurt watched in light amusement as Finn placed his hand on Quinn's belly, only to look like it got kicked off a moment later. Kurt had to turn his confidence up to maximum to break the moment. Privately, he could still feel the stings of the Clingy Girlfriend Quote in the back of his mind. But he did it, interrupted them and politely asked for Finn's attention. Leaving Tina and Quinn to talk, Kurt drilled for details.

Apparently, after the episode, Puck had cornered Finn and had let him know just how un-gay he was, informing him that the only reason he'd stood up for the two was because they'd been friends once and he didn't want the club to end up with another lackluster performance. It sounded like garbage to Kurt, but in reality, it was one of the nicest things Noah Puckerman had ever done for anyone but himself (And maybe Quinn.) They'd ended with a friendly handshake and a warning to watch out for slushies on the fly.

It was as close as a peace treaty was going to come.

_Is it over?  
(The stars keep this fire from burning out)  
Is it over?  
(Are you saying that you'd really listen?)  
Is it over?  
(The stars keep this fire)  
Is it over?  
(The stars keep this fire)_

As for the boys themselves, things were going well. After the immediate dream time in which they didn't know how to act around each other (Affectionate? Plainly? Melancholy?) things smoothed out. They moved past the stages that they never would have before, and before long could be looked at as a proper couple. Little things that made them each other were shared, they were affectionate, happy. When it was pointed out to Finn that sometimes when he thought of something funny or clever, his eyebrow would raise just the slightest bit like Kurt, it was laughed off. Sometimes Kurt would turn a phrase in a way that was simplistic, a little thing Finn did all the time.

The worst debates were usually about fashion, or Finn's lack thereof. It wasn't so much that Finn cared what others thought, more along the lines that he just didn't feel right in those fancy over-hyped outfits that Kurt adored. Kurt would give up nothing in the way of his own clothing, oh hell no, but he soon grew to accept the fact that Finn would never be quite as fashionable as him. That didn't stop the little accessories or tidbits that always seemed to make it into Finn's simpler outfits, but hey, it was a compromise.

Both boys had decided right off the bat not to tell Carol or Burt. The way things were looking, the pair was not about to separate any time soon, and any awkwardness that could be caused by their situation (And there was a lot) was easily avoidable. Deciding that they'd cross that particular bridge when they got to it, the boys kept their affections subtle to none when the parents were around. That's not to say that when they weren't around, though, things went wild and crazy. Finn had accounted himself as straight all his life, and even though he loved loved abso-freaking-lutely _loved_ the feeling of Kurt's lips on his, he was rightly terrified to go any farther. They had their moments of passion, of course, but Finn just wasn't ready to take _that _big step. And even if it drove Kurt a little crazy, he was willing to put up with it. One day, he knew, Finn would be ready.

They boys were just a couple. They bonded, they laughed, they argued, they made up. They were two people who met in a most normal way, and just happened to fall into eachothers arms on that crazy roller coaster called love. They had no way to know where things were going or how they would end up. The future seemed farfetched to them as they napped, coddled up on Kurt's futon, or as Kurt sat in Finn's lap, Finn's cologne smelling arms wrapped about his shoulders. They were just a couple of crazy kids in love. Anything and everything could go right or wrong. But it didn't matter to them, not yet.

_If the stars say that you couldn't love me,  
Are you telling me that you would listen?  
If the words make their way from your mouth,  
Don't ask my permission…_

On stage, the number was coming to a close. Both boys were in the heat of battle now, moving and swirling, staring at each other from across the room as they did their best to look professional and talented. As far as Kurt could tell, there was no protest going on, no one had gotten up and left, and they had yet to be pelted with anything spoiled or made of glass. Kurt ran, his arms finding Finn's as he jumped, caught a split second before a very painful connection with the ground. (He would know, after a few rough/ slippery handed rehersals) Finn's arms wrapped around Kurt's waist, his other behind Kurt's head. Kurt exhaled, knowing it would soon be over.

Finn smiled at him as he hauled the smaller boy up onto his feet. Their last few steps were done hand in hand, as they'd been planned. Kurt smiled, looking at Finn's sweet face. The last words slipped softly from his lips.

…_All is forgiven._

* * *

_And so it is done._

It's weird. I had so much fun writing this, it's actually really weird to think that I'm just, like, done. The end. No more of our little tale. That's not to say I'm never writing again…

OKAY-YES. A Doctor Who/Glee is in the works! But I'm a HUGE Doctor Who fan and dammit if I'll have it be under researched or rushed. It WILL be good though. Funny, clever, witty. I decided to go with 11 and Amy (It was a struggle, let me tell you. .____.;) so I'll have the mad Doctor to play around with. And he and Kurt can bond over Bow-ties. (That may have been the deciding factor, actually. xD) But, it's still in the works and very, very rough. I dunno when I'll actually get down to business and write it, but I'll do my best. .3.

And a Kurt/(It's a secret!) oneshot. Because those are fun.

Ah. Ahem. Outburst aside, this is my authors note and I will make it as sappy as I please. .n.

Actually, I think I'm done with the sappy stuff. Just a general thank you to all the people who gave this the reviews (They're in the process of being printed right now! I have a physical file marked 'T.W.S.' with the story, the reviews, and for fan art if I ever get any. –Pointed glare at a certain Ashleeasarus- so if I ever feel sad I can just look at it and smile. heart.~) and to everyone who favorited, every time I get the little e-mail notification I smile to myself.

I wrote this to get out a little muse I'd had, starting as a oneshot, then a oneshot with a prologue, and then this happened. xD I know it may not seem like a big deal to any and all experienced Fic writers, but this is my first ever completed fanfic, and one of the very few stories I've written that I've made myself end. That's also why I'm so thankful, I guess, because without your guys' reviews and pleads to write more, I would have put off part two forever and never actually made myself do it.

Accomplishment!

Well, TTFN, I suppose. See y'all later!


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